No One Knows When to Celebrate the 4th of July This Year and it Sucks

Not this year Uncle Sam...those girls have work Thursday...Sucks, huh?

It's a joke, an absolute joke. You just flat out cannot have the biggest summer holiday of the year on a goddamn Wednesday. It doesn't work. No one knows what to do.

Celebrate the weekend before? And risk having a bunch of no-shows at your weirdo, super early BBQ because they're afraid of going too hard on the first lap of the race with all the other potential parties looming later in the week? No thanks.

Celebrate the weekend after? For sure not. Throwing your 4th of July BBQ on July 7th is just setting  yourself up for disaster, running the risk of throwing your party after everyone else already beat you to the punch. It'd be the Newmanium, Kramanium situation all over again.

Toss it on a frigen Wednesday? I guess it's the only feasible option, but it flat out sucks. So now I'm expected to go to a backyard pool party on a random Wednesday full on knowing that I'm going to be miserable/throwing up in the handicap stall at work the next day? Gee thanks.

Personally I blame the Founding Fathers for this mess. Pretty much the most important national holiday we got and we couldn't secure the coveted Monday/Friday time slot? What kinda bullshit is that.

We couldn't have pulled some kinda Easter like thing and said 4th of July is the first Sunday after the first full moon in July? Of just called it the first Friday of every July? I know the actual date is important but you're slapping that importance right in the face by making me choose to either drink responsibly or go hard and have a miserable day at work the next day....I mean what kind of world are we living in where someone like myself, a full blown American, had more fun celebrating Cinco De Mayo this year than I will the 4th of July. It makes zero sense. We're better than that. Either we start manipulating our calendars so the 4th of July falls on a Monday/Friday every single year and just say fuck the rest of the world, we're doing this...Or, we fall in line and follow the same Monday/Friday rules that Memorial and Veterans day follow so Americans everywhere never have to go through this nightmare again.

And if anyone can forward this to either Romney or Obama, I can guarantee them, they stump for this issue, its a guaranteed election. Guaranteed.

Red Sox Playing Indian Rubber Rules Against the Mariners

OUT!

In my league anyway. If I'm running MLB I'm instantly installing the Indian Rubber rule. The game's interesting quotient would automatically increase ten-fold.

Plus it'd be fun to monitor things like guys who defenses are most likely to try and get out by Indian rubber. Think about it, it's always going to be easier to just go to the base, except in the rare case that you're a 2b or 3b and someone happens to be crossing right in front of you, you've got to have a real axe to grind not to take the easy out but to try and inflict some pain in your opponent.

I'd say guys like Youk would probably lead the league in OBIR (out by Indian Rubbers), assholes that you love on your team and the rest of the league hates with the fire of a thousand suns. Those guys plus Arod. Arod might never make a traditional out again in his life if I'm the commissioner of baseball...in fact I'd make Indian Rubbers of Arod worth two outs, and they can carry over to the next inning. That's how much I'd love to see his ass get lit up.

Though I don't Condone Graffiti, This is Hilarious

It's just the word Grundle. It's one of the top 3 or so funny words on its own, in any setting. It's like kaka (caucau? I don't know how to spell it, the word for shit you say when you're like 8) in that regard.

Every time I see it I laugh. Though it's mainly because this one time in college we were playing drinking "never have I ever" and some girl just blatantly outed her friend at the table as a grundle licker. To the grundle munchers credit, she played by the rules and admitted the truth. Said she was in a year long relationship and didn't want the guy to get bored...Ok then. Anyway, the story still cracks me up to this day, and the word Grundle will always appeal to my immature nature.

Celtics Draft Blog Recap: Who Predicted Sullinger and Melo?

Who called that one? Oh yea, ME. Nailed it:

No big deal. Part time blogger, most of the time slacker Seany-Mo has got a lot to learn. Kid thinks because he watched Vanderbilt a few times this year he knows what's going on. Get out of the sandbox little boy and let the big kids play.

I assume I just sit back and let the ESPN insider offers roll in now? Like Chad Ford is out, and you'll be seeing CW Mock Draft 15.2 next year? Because Chad either has horrid sources or couldn't have been more wrong. All week I wondered why no one was talking about the Bobcats taking MKG, all week he talked about how they were taking Beal, Robinson or Trading. All week he talked about Houston not using any of their 3 picks and trading them all away...they took all three picks. He flat out couldn't have been more wrong. I couldn't have been more right. Get at me ESPN. I want the Rick Reilly package.