Tuesday Hoops With The Maestro

The Maestro went 1-2 in his posting debut this weekend, which is unfortunate. Allegedly the Pats scored a garbage time touchdown to push that total over, but I think I was in a gutter somewhere at that point. Anyways, no rest for the weary, despite CW’s shots at me…hey, haters gonna hate, as I always say.

I love betting college hoops, and we hit on Pitt last night to start the week off right…I know, I know, “Hey Maestro, thanks again for telling us after the game!”. Well remember that gutter? Yeah, well regardless, I’m back today:

Georgetown @ Seton Hall (+4) – I’m a Georgetown fan, lets get that out there right away. However, I’m not above betting against my favorite team in a college hoops season…its too long and I like money too much not to. After starting the season off strong, Georgetown is having some major offensive issues. Seton Hall, on the other hand, is just getting their best player Jeremy Hazell back after, wait for it…he was shot in a robbery attempt. I can’t tell you how many games I missed in high school after being shot in robberies, but I digress. Anyways, I like the Pirates at home tonight to cover the 4 and possibly get a win against the struggling Hoyas. Pick: Seton Hall +4

Tennessee @ Georgia (-4) – Georgia is a team I’ve made some money on this year, especially at home, and I think that continues tonight. Tennessee just had a big comeback win on ESPN over rival Vanderbilt, and I expect a huge letdown here as they go down to Athens. The team has been kind of schizophrenic this year, and this is certainly not a good spot for them. I think the Dawgs continue their under the radar season here with a nice home win. If You Like Money: Georgia -4

Andre Agassi is Into Some Kinky Stuff: Shows off Nude Photos of Wife for Auction

TAIPEI, Taiwan -- The man who won an auction to buy a plate from Andre Agassi and see a naked picture of the tennis great's wife said Tuesday he is not 100 percent sure the nude back in the photo belonged to Steffi Graf.

Agassi took part in the auction while he was in Taiwan earlier this month for an exhibition tennis match. Standing on stage holding up the plate, Agassi said: "You pay more than $4,000, and I will show you a picture of my wife -- on my phone -- naked." Franz Chen, CEO of Taiwanese porcelain manufacturer Franz Collection Inc., says he won the auction and that in exchange for the equivalent of $7,000 Agassi showed him a photo of the naked back of a blonde-haired woman.

First off, I'll believe it was her in the photo.  If you're bold enough as a public figure to make that offer then you have to follow through, after all, as Andre always said in his commercials, "Image is Everything."

Now to the important question, why throw in the plate? Did thing thing add any value or was it one of the standard run of the mill Crate and Barrel Plates? Nice plates? Sure,  but I'm guessing this guy didn't drop seven grand for a nice piece of ceramics.  Why not save the plate so you and your exhibitionist wife still have a full set when you're entertaining guests

PS: I feel like if you just mention the word nude to a foreign asian business man he'll automatically start giggling childishly while emptying the contents of his wallet.  The guys are like sexually repressed teenagers. 

What is Everyone Doing With Their Social Security Raise?

For those of you who have no clue what that title is about, have no fear.  CW does enough reading and browsing of the news during his slack time at work for his entire readership. 


Basically for 2011 the social security deductions, previously at 6.2% annually, have been cut to 4.2%.  That's essentially a 2% raise for everyone (or at least everyone earning below $106K per year, so 99.99% of my readership).  So my question is, what are ya'll gonna do with that cash? A few thoughts for the Americans amongst you (I have no clue what kind of crazy shit foreigners spend their money on):


 Jet ski - Don't think 2% is a lot of cake? Assume you make ~$50k, that two percent difference is a cool Grand.  That's money to burn. Coupled with the fact that if you live up in the northeast like I do jetski salesmen would practically fall over themselves to sell a Seadoo right now (its snowing for what feels like the 17th consecutive day). Plus, Kenny Fucking Powers rides a Jet ski, you'd be in good company.

Gamble with maestro-  I know, I know.  He let you down, he let himself down. But you know what the thing is about gamblers?  You're never really up, sure you win once in a while, but all in all you're going to lose.  Might as well do it with the Maestro, right? A guy to share your pain with and trade war stories about times you were this close (If you're reading this Maestro, you're going to have to make me eat my words before I stop, CW may not be "constantly winning" but he definitely wasn't losing this weekend either).

Tighty-whitey fiscally conservative method of "saving it"- Definitely the chosen method of our other new blogger set to debut this week (fittingly he's chosen to go by H.E. Pennypacker). Consumate logical thinker, presenting essentially the complete opposite of my loosely held opinions.  Enjoy collecting that .75% interest, I'm sure those $3 bucks will come in handy at the end of the year.

Buy an I-Product - Seems to be the standard these days, everyone running around wasting their money on overpriced gadgets that have an apple logo.  Shits ridiculous.  Apple is about to announce record breaking earnings for the 4th quarter of 2010 and supposedly everyone and their freaken uncle is in debt.  Gee, I wonder why.

Donate it to a blogger- We're poor and advertising free.  Plus now we have to make up for the Maestros losings. 

Most likely blowing on acohol- I assume most of my readers are chooing this method, so am I.

The Perversion of the US Constitution

LA Times - Now it is faced with another controversial test of free speech. The question is: Does the Constitution ? boobies?...In the five years since the Keep A Breast Foundation began its campaign to make young people aware of breast cancer, it has sold more than 2 million rubber wristbands inscribed with the words: "I ? boobies." It would appear that many of those wristbands have turned up where there is maximum potential for adolescent interest in boobies: middle school...Some students and teachers had found them offensive, and some boys had been overly enthusiastic about them, telling girls, "I love your boobies."  That development, in turn, has incited the wrath of a group of adults that decidedly does not love the wristbands: middle-school administrators.

You're god damn right the Constitution was set up to protect speech like this.  Kids in middle schools are interested in boobies? There's a shock.  Everyone knows the 6th and 7th grade is when girls stop having cooties, its just science, so it's only natural that these 10-13 year old's would wear bracelets to celebrate this scientific break through.

And on a more serious note, Yes, I'd rather our constitution protect fluky cases of free speech such as that than stick to a hard line view that some Supreme Court Justices have recently expressed preference for;

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia: said in a recently published interview that the equal protection clause of the 14th Amendment does not prohibit discrimination based on gender or sexual orientation."Certainly the Constitution does not require discrimination on the basis of sex," Scalia told California Lawyer. "The only issue is whether it prohibits it. It doesn't. Nobody ever thought that that's what it meant. Nobody ever voted for that. If the current society wants to outlaw discrimination by sex, hey we have things called legislatures, and they enact things called laws." 

Interesting, that from one of the 9 most powerful Judges in our American, conveniently appointed for life, I might add.   FYI ladies, he's looking right at you.  Apparently because our founding fathers didn't believe discriminating against woman was a big deal, nor should we today.  

Here's my big problem with these "Constitutional Conservatives." If we were supposed to follow the constitution by the exact words it was written, we'd still have slavery, and woman couldn't vote.  We'd also live in a world of limited interstate commerce, no national drug laws, and presumably we'd all be getting around by horse and buggy.  We'd just be stuck in the past adhering to hard set laws and rules set forth by a bunch of whig wearing old men from hundreds of years ago...we'd be Iran, Morocco, Pakistan and Indonesia.  Countries governed by unbending rules and laws set forth ages ago.  We'd be stuck in the stone age with these backwards ass countries.  The fact is that our wise old Bastard Founding Fathers left open the ability to ammend and adapt our governing law because they understood society will change and there will be situations they could have never foreseen.  People who want to live in a simpler, more archaic time should move to Amish Country or go live on an FLDS reservation.  You'll get all the simplicity you could ever want.

How lunatics, and yes Justice Antonin Scalia is a lunatic, fancy title aside, can be appointed to such a prestigious and powerful post is beyond my understanding.  You may not like the ways of modern life, but any clear headed thinker can see that most change is all in the name of progress. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but freedom of change is never done in hopes of bringing about the self depreciation for the rest of society, unlike expressing ideas that woman, gays, and transgenders aren't constitutionally protected. 

Review: Who Else Watched MTV's Skins?

So basically in every episode of the Jersey Shore dating back to Miami (yea its a guilty pleasure, don't pretend you don't watch it), MTV has completely bombarded us with commercials for Skins, its upcoming teen-life drama (only guaranteed to be more edgy and cool than 90210 because it's MTV). 

MTV went so far to shove this down my throat (that's what she said) that they aired a special Monday episode of The Shore just to lead into this show.  It worked.  

I, like a few other million either curious or too lazy to change the channel viewers were subjected to MTV's take on current day teen-life.  And here it is; apparently MTV believes high schools are currently divided between hipster burnouts and rich preppies, all of whom are interested in sex, drugs, booze, and cleavage (actually the sex, drugs, booze and cleavage is probably true for the most part).  

Now, I get that MTV was going for hyperbole (I hope).  The overly angry and fascist parents, the kid with porn mags just spread all over his room, the uber cool kid with his satchel and karate moves (yep, Karate moves) the slutty high school girl who will do anything for good narcotics, and the rich prepster chic who wants the bad boy from the other side of the tracks so bad that she throws a non-parentally supervised party in Mummy and Daddy's Parlor (gasp!).   But all of that made the show suck. There wasn't one character who felt real, no one to connect to.  Just a bunch of hipster douche bags and entitled rich kids.  And they couldn't even get that right because I didn't find myself overly hating the characters enough to keep watching and rooting against them.  I just found them obnoxious enough to cancel my DVR New Episodes setting. 

The show ended (spoiler alert), with the cool kid's virgin friend still a virgin, the gang sinking a stolen Escalade (while they were inside, don't worry, sadly they escaped), and a gigantic pound of pot sinking with the car that they still owe their local drug dealer for (don't worry, in keeping with the show he's a gigantic stereotype as well), which I'm sure will set them up for a few episodes to come.

Over all rating...Yawn.

Troll Body Art, Could Be A Big Thing...

Figured we'd start the day with some light-hearted armpit Trolling, given this past weekends sports events. Not only do the Pats forget to show up for a playoff game, but my new found Sports Betting Blogger crapped out on his first weekend.  To be fair he claimed all along that he wasn't too keen on any of the games this past weekend, but like the true gambler he is, he put some picks out there anyway.  I'm sure it's no consolation to any of your wallets (you did take his advice, right?) but Maestro's assured me that his College BBall acumen is much bettor, and to expect a few winners this week (my words not his).  We'll see.