Former NFL QB Mark Rypien's Daughter Makes QB Debute in Lingerie League

She certainly has the looks, but does she have her Dad's legendary QB skills? And I'm not talking about his Super Bowl MVP trophy or the couple of pro bowl appearances Daddy made, I'm talking about his unparalled skills in perhaps the greatest original GameBoy game of all time... 

The NFL Quarterback Club.

10 of the leagues best battling it out in the three categories all NFL QB's must excel at: Accuracy, Obstacle Course, and Read and Recognition. 

Let me tell you folks, Mark Rypien was the king of this game, and I should know. I played this game so often I basically wore down the A and B buttons on my Gameboy to the nub.  Had blisters on my thump from rapidly alternating between both as fast as I could to get my obstacle course times down. 

This is no small accomplishment for Mark either...at face value, he's easily the worst of the bunch on that cover. I mean look,  you've got absolute NFL greats, Aikman, Young, and Elway. Statistical Freaks in Moon, Cunningham and Kelly. Beloved TV announcers in Simms and Esiason. And then you've got Kosar and Rypien. But none of that matters (except in the case of Kosar, much like in real life, he sucked in this game).  Rypien tore those others' asses up in this game. Just the perfect blend of speed, accuracy and power.  Sure he could never keep up with Cunningham through the obstacle course, and Elway could out throw him by a country mile, but all combined? In Mark Rypien, you're looking at the perfect quarterback...Or at least what the Japanese programmers who made the game assumed was a perfect quarterback.

That's a lot to live up to for his daughter. Luckily she has other...skills? Yea skill. Lukcily she has other skills to fall back on.

Struggling To Pay for College? The Spearmint Rhino Wants You!

Yep, from one socially conscious blog about child hunger and Sesame Street to the Spearmint Rhino and strippers, that's how the 'Tab rolls.

Daily Mail - Hard-up students anxious about spiralling debt should consider working as lap dancers, says a boss Spearmint Rhino. John Specht, UK vice president of the lap-dancing chain, said: 'These girls earn a lot. Some of these girls are on their own and their parents can’t help them or are unable to help them. 'With the rising student fees the students know that they can come in and earn the money they need to survive. One Sheffield student, Jilly, who is studying for a law degree with hopes of becoming a corporate lawyer, started work at the club in the city two years ago. She said : 'I came to Spearmint Rhino because it was a way for me to cover most of my bills whilst working at the university. I am studying Law and I want to be a corporate lawyer. 'I worry massively that somebody might find out that I’ve done this and it might affect my career but I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. 'Hopefully if it does happen I’ve got the necessary skills to explain that I am a student at university and I’ve got overheads ask what would you do if you were in my shoes?.”

I don't know who John Specht is trying to convince here, haven't strippers been "just working their way through college" for years now? Or at least paying for classes at Community College. In my limited experience I can't ever remember a "dancer" passing her story off as a high school drop out just looking for easy cash, or "I dance to support my 5 children while my baby-daddy gets drunk over there at the bar."

No, quite the contrary. If you took a quick poll while in a strip club asking what all the girls are using stripping to pay for you'd come away thinking you'd just hung out with one of the brightest collection of minds this side of a MENSA convention. Just Rhodes Scholars, law students, and pre-med naughty nurses in every direction.  Hell, I once saw a legit 40 year old sad sack of a woman who I'm pretty sure was trying to pass off a story that she was just paying for her ph.d in physics.

So what I'm saying is, no need to recruit these college girls bro, the smart girls have been making the right choice for years. A few years of stripping to pay for a degree and a lifetime of respect and adoration as a well schooled and skilled politician/doctor/professional afterwards...right ladies?

Sesame Street Creates Cute Loveable Girl Character as Face of Child Hunger...Oscar is Pissed

NY Times - The familiar address of Sesame Street is about to get a new visitor, one who could surely benefit from the sunny days and friendly neighbors there. For a prime-time special to raise awareness about hunger faced by American families, Sesame Workshop, the nonprofit organization that produces “Sesame Street,” has created a new Muppet character named Lily, a 7-year-old girl representing one of the 17 million American children that the Department of Agriculture estimates are “food insecure,” meaning their access to food is limited or uncertain. “We thought long and hard about how do we really represent this from a child’s point of view?” Jeanette Betancourt, Sesame Workshop’s senior vice president for outreach and educational practices, said on Monday morning in a telephone interview. “We felt it was best to have this new Muppet take this on in a positive way and a healthy way.”

Boy, this is going to stick right in Oscar's craw, just ruin his day.  He's Oscar the Freaking Grouch. He lives in a trash can on the side of the street and as far as I can tell, has been surviving on pizza crust and half eaten donut sticks for like 40 years. He's so malnourished he's turned green, he's never gotten a special on hunger.  But then a cute faced little girl comes along and all of a sudden starvation is a big deal. Like Grouches that live in trash cans don't gotta eat either.

And frankly, the Sesame Workshop writers are going about this all wrong. Sorry, but all wrong. Giving this Lily bright colors, a decent outfit and taking on the problem in a "positive and healthy way." That's not going to do anything, sure its nice for children watching the show, but children aren't funding soup kitchens and volunteering time and non-perishables. 4 and 5 year olds watching this can't do squadoosh to help the situation, and parents are just going to assume Dora the Explorer moved to Sesame Street for some reason.

You want to urge change, make it real. Make that child die from starvation on screen. Sure it'll probably scar little kids, but then parents will have to tune in, figure out what's going on, and you can be damn sure they're not going to sit idly by while kids are bawling their eyes out urging mom and dad to bring a 10-pack of Spaghetti O's down to the neighborhood food pantry.

Or you can do it your way and have the face of child hunger be some cutesy colorful muppet who I'm sure everything works out for. I guess I didn't really expect anything less when we're at the point in society where instead of calling a kid homeless or starving we said they're food or shelter "insecure." Yea they're insecure because they have none. Lets be real about this. It's a lot easier to ignore someone's problems when they're characterized as "insecure." A lot harder to ignore something when you say that 7 year old kid will be sleeping in a cardboard box with his Mom tonight and might not eat until Thursday.

Worst Or Best Magic Trick of All Time?

Best, definitely the best. Flawless execution, and the diversion is impeccable. Get the audience all distracted with the standard "pull the sheet out from under this Tea Pot set," taking our attention away from the coming "evaporating child under a TV Entertainment Center" trick. Brilliant.

PS: Kid is definitely dead.

Double PS: Grandma.is.going.to.be.pissed. I've never seen a more Grandma dining room before in my life. Just old school tea set, wall paper that for sure matches her good dinnerware set, and some random bird artwork that she 100% picked up on the cheap at Building 19.