Guy Brings an Iphone to a Knife fight

Guy Holds Up Store with Iphone - An accused would-be restaurant robber had a change of heart Wednesday, after cooks at the establishment grabbed knives to defend themselves.  Police said Jerome Taylor, 20, wore a mask as he entered the Northern Indian restaurant on State Street Wednesday afternoon.  He pulled what the cooks thought was a gun and demanded money, according to police. But the cooks grabbed knives and said they weren't handing anything over. At that point, Taylor became apologetic and told the cooks he was only kidding and that he needed money for his child, police said. Taylor was gone by the time police arrived, but they caught up with him a short time later. Officers said Taylor confessed to the crime, but told them he didn't have a gun, but used an iPhone.

What gives Steve Jobs? Where's the app for that?  Shits not this guys fault. If you tell us there's an app for everything there better damn well be an app for everything, otherwise you're going to run into this kind of situation.  Just another case of a fairly standard application missing from the Iphone.

This guy should be living it up down in the West Caymans with the $175 he should have made off with, just I-chatting away while sipping a Pina Colada.  Instead he's locked up in Sing-Sing making collect calls from a pay phone, wondering why he ever trusted Jobs and his Apple Marketing Machine.  Damn.

Things I Hate About Snow Storms.

1.  Assholes that have been going around saying they can't wait for snow.  These pricks.  Love to toss out in conversation how they ski and snowboard, like its some kind of revered hobby.  They realize that we live a good two hours from any respectable mountain right?  Like I'm sure there is snow on the mountain when its not snowing in Boston.  No need to wish misery on everyone elses life.   And I can think of plenty of smarter things to do than wakeing up at 5 AM, cleaning off my car, packing my car with skis and snowboards, driving anywhere from 2-4 hours, getting dressed, forking over $75+, and riding down a hill in the freezing cold.  For example, I'd rather sleep in, have some coffee and breakfast in front of the TV, clean my car off later in the day, go down the street and go snow tubing for free, return home for spiked hot chocolate, and cap it off by watching TV.

2.  The slew of inevitable first year workers that are going to call out today because their cars are buried.  Newsflash, this isn't college or highschool anymore.  The real world goes on when it snows.  This wasn't some freak surprise storm either, heard about it all week, you knew it was coming.  Not my fault you stupidly thought you'd be able to shovel yourself out 5 minutes before you usually go to work, don't expect me to pick up your slack because of your ignorance.

3.  Plowmen.  I've shoveled out my car 3 times since last night.  Odds that I go back out there and I'm plowed back in? Strong to Pretty Strong.  Mind you I'm in a parking lot, not some commoner on the street.  The guy saw me out there slaving away this morning clearing out my car, but I'll put $20 on it right now that there is a gigantic pile of snow back behind my car as I'm typing this.  I really hope that's not true, I really don't want to be the star of the Blizzard of O-Ten's first homicide story.  

4.  News stations.  We get it, we've been through blizzards and Nor'easters before.  We understand that the Boston area will get a little less than west and north of the city, and the assholes on the Cape will only get rain.  We don't need 20 reporters out there in their winter gear picking up snow and telling funny (not so funny) little anecdotes about the snow, or the obligatory interview with the state plowmen in front of a gigantic salt or sand pile.  Oh really? The plows are working hard to clear the roads, what a novel concept.  And thank you so much for the hard hitting news that the roads are a mess.  I just assumed when we get 12-20 inches of snow the roads will be perfectly fine.  The worst part is these guys take over the regularly scheduled programming.  Who the hell is sitting at home hoping for a 5 hour broadcast solely on the snow storm? What genius came up with this plan.  It's like a sick joke every blizzard, like all the local station producers get together and wager on who can report on the snow storm the longest without alienating their viewer base. 

I'm sure I'm forgetting some, but I'm in a rush assuming I have to get back out there and shovel again before work.  If I missed any or you have any gripes you'd like to air feel free to drop them in the comments section.

Snow Storm Makes Me Wish I Was A Hair Dresser

This made me laugh after shoveling for over an hour at the crack of dawn this morning.  Is there even a need to report that hairdressing school is closed? Do you really think these high school drop outs even considered getting up to shovel out their car this morning?  There isn't a doubt in my mind that these floozies started hitting the peppermint schnapps hard as soon as they heard a blizzard was coming, just planning on sleeping in since last Thursday.  But hey, thanks for the laugh Fox 25.

Angry snow related rant still to come.