Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Joan Rivers?


WFXT - New York Post -- Some women think of their husbands' moms as monsters-in-law and would do almost anything -- including having a root canal -- to get out of spending time with them, the New York Post reported Monday...When asked who they might like to have as a mother-in-law, 17 percent of the women said they would like Hillary Rodham Clinton, 16 percent said reality-show star Kris Kardashian Jenner, 9 percent said Sarah Palin and 7 percent said Joan Rivers.

Really Ladies?  You don't think that the problem could be related to your deranged, delusional, irrational thoughts on this one?  I know there can be mother in laws out there that are absolute bitches to deal with but Joan Rivers, Sarah Palin, Hillary, and Kris Kardashian?  If you were starting a mother in laws from hell basketball team that would be four of your starting five (the fifth being the mother in law from Everyone Loves Raymond). Lets just break each one down real quick:

Rivers - Bitch of all Bitches. Would critique your appearance every chance she got
Palin - Definition of an overachiever, 3 kids, a grandkid and a Nationally Mocked admired idiot politician. So you'd have that to live up to.
Hillary - Cold as ice personality and the ultimate perfectionist. Good luck warming up to her.
Kris Kardashian - Great if you're looking for your mother in law to whore you out the way she has done and continues to do with her daughters.

Just further proof that girls are usually their own worst enemy when it comes to relationships (that and you're watching entirely too much reality television).  I'm not saying guys don't have their faults too, but if this survey is any indication,  you girls are on a whole other level of crazy.

Animal Kingdom Strikes Back



Great Parenting here, encourage the girl to lure the gigantic Lion, lie to her and tell her the lion likes her and wants to kiss her after he tried to end her life and then teach your kids to be voyeurs while you record it taking a piss.  Don't be too surprised the first time you find out your daughter is into golden showers later in life. Either that or she becomes one of those deranged wilderness people who live with Tigers and Lions for fun (or because they're insane from childhood experiences such as this).

Huge week for the animals though, Lions scaring the shit out of little girls, Flying barracudas wreaking havoc on tourists who dare cross their territory, and Marlins just showing no mercy on their would be captors.  Got to hand it to the animals, they've made our quest for global supremacy a lot more challenge in recent times, refreshing to see them going down fighting.