Boston Globe Answers Tough Question: What's the Difference Between Red and Black Licorice?

Ask Dr. Knowledge - Real licorice, which is in black licorice candy, is made from the roots of the licorice plant, which can also be spelled liquorice. Red licorice isn’t really licorice at all, except in name. It’s just a red candy, which can be made with many different flavorings, including strawberry, cherry, raspberry, and cinnamon. Despite similarities in taste, licorice is not related to anise or fennel. American, Chinese, and European varieties of the licorice plant are all slightly different but have many similarities.

Yea, what he said, and also, Black licorice is fucking disgusting. Are you kidding me Dr. Knowledge? You take the time to research an extremely well thought and scientific answer and you miss the most obvious difference (aside from actual color)?  I don't care what it's made out of, I'll eat that red rope candy by the pound, I will not go near black licorice or black jelly beans to save my life. That's the real difference.

Side note: How is it that candy companies even still make black licorice? I mean how many people actually like this stuff? 1-100? 1-500? It's gross. I know 2 people that like it. 2! Out of everyone I know and have met. I just can't see how that's a profitable business to be in.

I Have Nothing to Contribute to Small Talk

Consider the most common question: "How's it going?"

I hate that question. It's the bane of my existance, and I'm guessing most of yours. Seriously, unless you've got a really fulfilling job saving lives or working on something really interesting, you've never had a good answer for that question (and since you're reading this blog, your job can't be important or interesting). I avoid that question like the plague, you either know me well enough to know how I'm doing or I don't talk to you. Plain and simple, you're not going to get to ask me that question unless you've got me cornered in some awkward social situation and I've got no-where to go.

Like, what are people expecting here? Some kind of open diatribe on how the last 2 weeks  to a month have gone for me? I got news for you, it's pretty boring and simple. I wake up, I blog, I go to work, I come home, maybe jog/probably watch tv, eat, go to bed. Occasionally there's a wildcard thrown in there, but even then it's something mundane like, got a hair cut or, changed a flat tire.  It's nothing life altering, I'll assure you of that. Believe me I'll knock on the door of every person I know if something life altering happens, you'll know.

My standard answers run down to:


"The Same" - Translation: "You see me fairly regularly, you know I've got nothing going on, what are you hassling me for?" A fairly quick way to snuff out that conversation. Let's face it, I've got nothing going on, and neither do you or you would have already volunteered it.

"You know, the usual, working for the weekends" - Translation: "I haven't seen you for a while and/or don't really know you and don't really feel like reconnecting or getting to know you, and if you follow up and ask me what my job is all about, I'll probably blatantly walk away from you." This is really reserved for old schoolmates, friends you've lost touch with, or acquaintances you were never really friends with anyway but they feel obligated to talk to you when you randomly bump into each other in line at the supermarket.


"I Have a Blog Now" - Translation: "I'm desperately trying to divert attention away from the fact that I've had basically the same basic job for 5 years now, just with a few different titles, it's boring as all hell and I really don't like explaining it to people because that means I actually have to think about my job while I'm not working." You know me, we probably haven't spoken in a while but I actually am interested in reconnecting, I'm just not willing to talk about my obscenely boring life.

That's it. Those are my answers. I literally have nothing else to contribute to small talk beyond those three answers. You want to talk about sports, beer, politics, random forms of technology, I'm all for it, you want to shoot the shit about nothing, that's what you'll get. 

Obama Really Needs to Step His Celebrity Game Up if He Wants to Get Re-Elected

Where did Cool Barry go? I want Cool Barry Back!

And I say this because I just spent the week on vacation in the Vineyard and the POTUS was only 3rd on my list of celebrities I was hoping to run into during the week…and that’s only of celebs I knew were there, he could have been further down the list for all I know. I suppose its partially not his fault, it’s hard to compete for the attention the same week Larry David and Morgan Freeman are patrolling around town, but still, CW 3 years ago would have been salivating at the chance to bump into Barry, now…not. I mean yea if I saw him I’d say hi, not like I’d snub him on the golf course or anything. I just wouldn’t be enthused.

But here's the thing, he absolutely needs that rock star status to get re-elected. Let's face it, he's not going to get re-elected based on his policy or presidency to date...I mean he's not horrible, he's just not been very good either. Basically he's like a C+ student, right in the meaty part of the curve, which is fine for high school students, awful for Commander in Chiefs (though decidedly better than his predecessor who was like the kid who was so slow he stayed back in the 3rd grade). 

Bottom line, no one's ever gotten elected when his voters would rather bump into the dude who'll probably play him in the movie about his presidency (Freeman) over the actual guy, that's a weak look that will not fly with the voters (of course this all may be moot if every Republican candidate continues to quote Bible scripture and praise Biblical storms, those wackadoos are not getting elected anyway).

2011: The Year Technology Was Discovered By Parents and Became Uncool

Most Definitely Not a Scene from the Next Apple Commercial

Observation from Vacation: Babyboomers are starting to use modern technology and it's funny and horrifying all at the same time.

Case in point, first half of my vaca was spent down in South Carolina with my fathers extended family at a beach house. It’s an annual trip, and a simple one at that, beach during the day, Boston pub four blocks away at night. You can’t really mess it up.

Unless your parents and aunts and uncles decided this was the year they’d turn the corner to hip and all get Ipads. I don’t know if its some kind of weird technology based mid-life crisis or what but there were laptops fired up, Bluetooth connections everwhere, crazy questions about Facebook and profile security, phrases like “do you do the twittering”, and “how do I load-down this”, and the always present Ipad.

Just a bizarre scene, at one point I watched as my uncle and mother each walked their Ipads down to the bar for some free wifi and proceeded to “facetime” each other, just to see how it works. I’d have been laughing my ass off if I wasn’t keenly aware that our table with the middle aged geeks of the weeks was the center of attention. I wish I filmed it, as an avowed apple hater nothing would have made all those apple hipsters feel less cool than seeing these two awkwardly try to interact via webcam while sitting a foot away from each other in a bar, but alas. The 2011 family vaca will forever be the vacation I remember as the year technology became uncool.

Now excuse me while I go call my telephone company about getting a landline installed over here…I need some excuse as to why I haven’t accepted my parents facebook request yet.

Check Out This Bro's Where's Waldo Tattoo

Daily Mail - One Where's Wally fan will always be able to find his favourite stripy-shirted children's character - after having him tattooed on his back. Music producer John Mosley , 22, sat patiently for 24 hours while tattooist Rytch Soddy created a scene featuring150 characters and Wally hiding among them. The artwork was created in s studio in Norwich and raised £2,000 for charity.

Bro, 2000 quid for that shit? I think you got ripped off. This was like the equivalent of the first page or two of Where's Waldo, the easy ones that kids can solve themselves, for 2,000 pounds you should get one of the real difficult ones that you had to run and get your dad to help out with.

Plus, a quick google search reveals several people with Waldo tattoos, but you know what you can't find? Anyone with a 3D Art Tattoo. Now there's a challenge, you think strangers rolling up to you looking for a red and white hipster is weird, just wait until you've got throngs of people surrounding you squinting their eyes trying to get a glimpse of a sailboat silhouette. That'll get awkward real quick.