The Road Ahead: The Celtics Road to Recovery Part 2

CW's Wish, Seany Mo's Nightmare? I smell a retort coming.

ED Note: This is Part 2 of Seany-Mo's Celtics Draft Preview. For Part 1, Click Here. For valid basketball opinions, read this, then check back later this week when CW posts an educated look in at what the Celtics draft strategy should be.

Here’s who I’d like in green next year at both picks ranked from “unless every other GM is whacked out on black tar heroin, it won’t happen even though I’d love it” to “Danny, If you have any affection for us at all as fans, STAY AWAY!”

At 22…

PIPE DREAM

Perry Jones III, PF, Baylor- General sentiment seems to be that Jones, despite going back to school forhis sophomore season, didn’t really develop on the court as much as expected. His potential is offthe charts (6’10 power forward with fluid athleticism and a full repertoire of tools.) At times when I watched Baylor this year, Jones looks like he can do it all, from stroking threes to playing with his backto the basket to bringing the ball up in transition. At others, he looked completely lost, turning the ball over on an ill advised pass or getting charging calls when failing to read a help defender switching ontohim. At this point, picking Jones would be gambling on his massive untapped potential and at the 21 stpick, should he slip this low, it would be a fantastic steal.

HEY IT COULD HAPPEN…RIGHT?

Terrence Ross, SF, Washington- Ross is a rapidly improving jump shooter with fantastic ability operating off the ball and tremendous speed for a wing player. Although not even close to a Ray Allen caliber of shooting, Ross would function similarly in the Celtics offense by playing off the ball and letting Rondo find him on the perimeter or busting his ass down the court in transition in the hopes of getting an easy dunk. He struggles with ball handling and creating his own shot, which at this point only an aging Paul Pierce can do, but Ross at least would give us the ability to stretch the floor and create lanes for Rondo to operate with.

BLEND OF LIKELY AND SENSIBLE

Jeffery Taylor, SF, Vanderbilt- Taylor is a player I have actually seen the most of on this list the past two seasons, as my Uncle Ricky has actually met him a number of times and has a signed basketball from him. As Barney Stinson would say, “True Story.” In any case, I watched a number of Vanderbilt games so my observations here are based more on live games than selected scouting footage and compilations of various reports. Taylor has Tony Allen-esque defensive ability though he possess a much higher degree of basketball IQ than Tony (which isn’t saying much, since most fourth graders could make the same claim.) His lateral quickness was incredible, as I saw him stay right in front of the likes of Marquis Teague and Terrence Jones on numerous occaisons. Also encouraging is the development of a perimeter shot, which allowed him to boast a 54% field goal percentage this season (a career high.) He can become very passive at times, but if he is asked to come off the bench and provide defensive energy for the Celts, he should be able to make an immediate impact.

THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE

Fab Melo, C, Syracuse- Look, I know the Celtics have been struggling to find a big man since the Kendrick Perkins abomination, but I want absolutely nothing to do with Melo. Words wouldn’t fully convey my rage if the Celtics use one of their picks on this guy. He has great length that, as the old age goes, can’t be taught. But in my opinion, he doesn’t use it well at all. For such a tall player, he sucks at rebounding (Syracuse as a team was one of the worst in the country last season) as well as being extremely foul prone, committing about 3 per contest despite only playing 25 minutes per game. Sorry, but we just suffered through a foul prone, terrible rebounding center in Jermaine O’Neal. Not to mention this guy didn’t have the motivation to even show up to class and was deemed academically ineligible for the tournament. That doesn’t strike me as overly encouraging. Avoid this guy like the plague or I will break my TV on draft night. Don’t make me do that Danny, It’s a nice TV.

San Diego 7th Graders Suspended for Gayest Gay Test of All Time

HuffPo - Nine seventh grade students at a San Diego-based middle school were suspended last month after watching pornographic videos as part of a so-called "gay test," according to reports...According to U-T San Diego News, students in all-boys English class at Bell Middle School in Paradise Hills allegedly wore gym shorts as they watched videos on their cell phones. Whoever became sexually aroused while watching the videos was labeled gay, and several adolescents masturbated openly during the class.

Jesus H, kids aren't fucking around these days huh? Just whipping out their porn loaded cell phones and jacking it where they please? Damn. The gay test when I was a middle schooler was being able to name enough hot chics when you were shooting the shit with your friends. Cindy Crawford, Tyra Banks before she became all self-righteous, Kelly Kapowski, all the camp counselors from Hey Dude, etc...Basically the first one to run out of hot chics to talk about was gay for the day.

And I'm not even sure I understand what the hell these kids were trying to accomplish here. So you and a bunch of your bro's watch a porn on little Timmy's iphone, and if you're aroused, you've got the ghey? Is that right? Is it gay porn they're watching? What about the kids who whipped out more than their cell phones and started punching their dicks? Are they gay or is that cool? I really think we're either missing details to this little test or these kids got the rules all wrong.  Poor Jizz up there from Outside Providence (criminally underrated movie, FYI) was way ahead of his time apparently.

The Road Ahead: The Celtics Road to Recovery Part 1

The fact that Doc's quest for perfection from his guards probably means he'd kill his own son in the lockerroom doesn't deter me at all from salivating over this picture.

ED NOTE: This is part one of Seany-Mo's two part Celtics draft preview (part two later today). These opinions in no way represent CW's vast basketball knowledge. I'll have a retort to these cockamamie breakdowns later this week. 


Despite having our hearts ripped from our chests in yet another Game 7 meltdown, this past season just served to reinforce how much I love the Celtics. They could have packed it in about 50 times during the year for a number of valid reasons, but they kept on battling to the very last second. Kevin Garnett somehow found the Fountain of Youth and was putting up 20+ and 10+ with regularity while playing almost 40 minutes a night during the post season. Most encouraging, the team had started to come together at the right time despite a number of key players going down at some point this season with injury, which would make you think chemistry on the court would suffer (I don’t consider Jermaine O’ Neal one of these people. He is a malignant degenerative disease feasting upon the Celtics cap space.) I focus on the road to recovery because as gutsy and resilient as the Celtics stretch run was this past season, this team needs to focus on rebuilding for the future sooner rather than later. With the free agent pool drying up due to in season extensions (Kevin Love) and Dwight Howard keeping everyone hostage at the trade deadline, it seems apparent to me that the most immediate way to make this team better is to nail the draft this coming June. Usually being in this draft position (21, 22) it would be difficult to find an impact NBA player, but due to the lockout, this draft is extremely loaded and full of talent that can help this squad immediately. Additionally, these prospects are selected on what I perceive as a NEED for the Celtics, as well as how well they complement Rajon Rondo, as he is the cornerstone we should be building around. Here’s who I’d like in green next year at both picks ranked from “unless every other GM is whacked out on black tar heroin, it won’t happen even though I’d love it” to “Danny, If you have any affection for us at all as fans, STAY AWAY!”


At # 21…

PIPE DREAM

Austin Rivers, SG, Duke- Yes, this is partly because I think the dynamic of having Austin Rivers being coached by his dad would be really friggin’ cool. But on a more practical level, the Celtics, pure and simple, need people who can put the ball in the basket without being completely dependent on someone else. Rivers is a TREMENDOUS athlete at age 19 and has a nose for the basket. The dual threat of slashing to the bucket and having the ability to knock down threes makes me salivate at the prospect of seeing Rivers and Rondo run the break for years to come. Sadly, I believe Austin will be gone long before the Celtics pick comes along. Additionally, the emergence of Avery Bradley would make the acquisition of Rivers somewhat redundant. Still, it’s fun to think about.

HEY, IT COULD HAPPEN…RIGHT?


John Henson, PF/C, UNC- Yes, I understand he looks like Jujuan Johnson 2.0 with his impressive length yet wiry build, but let it be known Henson is a much more complete defensive player than Johnson at this point. Not to mention he comes from an absolute NBA player mill in North Carolina, where he has greatly benefitted under Roy Williams tutelage. Look no further than the progress he made in just one year from his freshman to sophomore season; More than doubled his points per game average and rebounds per game, as well as raising a good 1.6 blocks per game to a sterling 3.2 blocks per game. He may not possess the best offensive game quite yet, as he strictly relies on a left handed hook shot and his mid range shooting is still a major work in progress, but his nose for the ball both on the glass and in altering opponents shots makes him a tantalizing prospect for addressing the Celtics length, rebounding, and shot blocking issues. I’d look for Henson to initially step in as an interior defender who could contribute offensively by cutting off of back screens and looking for alley oops from Rondo while continuing to round out the rest of his game. Sadly, even with his less than impressive combine workout (in the bottom 5 in bench bress reps and vertical leap,) he will still likely be snatched up before we can picture him swatting shots into the first row at TD Garden.


BLEND OF LIKELY AND SENSIBLE


Arnett Moultrie PF/C, Mississippi State- A big man who excels at creating his offense off of cuts and back screens would be a perfect complement to Rajon Rondo on the fast break or even in the half court, which is exactly what Moultrie brings to the table. Not to mention the guy rebounds like an absolute boss on both the offensive, (5.3 offensive rebounds per game, pace adjusted for 40 minutes) and defensive glass (8.2 defensive rebounds per game, pace adjusted for 40 minutes.) which is impressive given some of the big men he was competing against in the SEC, like Anthony Davis, Festus Azeli, and Bradley Beal. While the lack of shot blocking ability is concerning for a guy who is listed as 6’11, consensus seems to be this is more so due more to lack of effort rather than talent. The defense malaise is a questions mark, but with given his rebound prowess, the Celtics should jump at this guy should he be available.


THIS IS MY NIGHTMARE


-Royce White, F, Iowa State- Given Danny’s propensity to select extremely athletic players that have significant questions marks (Gerald Green and J.R Giddens come to mind) this is a high risk/high reward pick that makes me extremely nervous. Don’t get me wrong, White has proven that he can score with the best of them, putting up impressive numbers against both Kansas and Baylor when they played this year (I believe he had an 18 point 10 rebound game when matched up with Thomas Robinson, but I could be making that up and am too lazy to check/my boss is prowling the hallways.) Despite this, the guy has been labeled as having significant character issues in addition to having a phobia of flying/ anxiety disorder. Given the amount of travel involved in an NBA season and the intensity of Rajon Rondo, I just don’t see White fitting in well with the Celtics. Kevin Garnett’s fiery passion alone may cause White to check himself into an asylum day one of training camp. Not to mention he’s a “tweener” forward who can’t naturally play either small or power forward, which we already have in Jeff Green, as well as a criminal accused of theft in the past. Pass on this guy.

Maria Menounous Still Getting Frisky With Dance Partners, This time it's Mel Gibson

TMZ - Mel Gibson blew off some serious steam Saturday night, partying until 4 AM at Maria Menounos' home. Maria threw a bash for her 34th birthday. A wardrobe friend of Maria's brought Mel along and he quickly made himself at home in her Encino pad, grinding away without a care in the world.

You think Maria's husband is just sitting off in a corner somewhere trying to get her attention, yelling over the music "Hey Maria, DWTS is over, you're no longer contractually obligated to bang everyone you dance with."

Poor dude. Got cuckolded on national tv, and now he's getting cuckolded in his own home by perhaps the most vile man in Hollywood. Does anyone else picture him exactly like this: