 |
| That's a real graph folks, I didn't even make it up. |
Boston - Karen Halvorson was walking down Tappan Street in Brookline about a month ago when she spotted three turkeys flying up against passing cars. Then she said the turkeys turned on her. Halvorson, who is 64 and five-feet tall, said three turkeys surrounded her and the dominant turkey flew up at her head and scratched her neck, breaking the skin, when she tried to duck.
Halvorson said she didn’t know what to do, until finally a passing motorist stopped, threw open a car door and let her jump in.
“I’m not sure what would have happened to me had she not stopped,” Halvorson said.While some voiced their support for protecting the birds and just trying to scare away the trouble makers, other neighbors are asked police to shoot the aggressive birds. One man in the audience even requested if he could spray-paint the problem birds so police can identify them.
Brookline Police Chief Daniel O’Leary said firing guns in the neighborhood is not an alternative, but the chief vowed the department will find a way to address the aggressive turkeys, and especially the three trouble-making tom turkeys.
Jesus, I mean, people of Dorchester are probably just counting their lucky stars every day they don't run into one of these mean mugging dinner fowls, huh? The worst they have to deal with is guns and murderers and shit...
Can I ask a question, just how soft are you, Brookline? I mean really? We're talking about turkeys here...to quote Urban Dictionary, to refer to someone as a turkey is to imply that: the person is a loser, uncoordinated, inept, and clumsy; a tool.
Is that what you guys are afraid of? Like you Karen, apparently a 6'5 woman just strolling the streets of Brookline, I'd think you can take care of yourself...just kick the damn things, PETA be damned. The minute these things cross the line from something that would look good on my dinner table, to an Alfred Hitchcock scenario, you're allowed to fight back. One or two punts to the breast bone and I think they'll get the message.
PS: The thought of the police "addressing troublesome turkeys" just makes me thing of scared straight...like the cops are gonna round up all these badass Turks, get in their face, and then show them a slide show of this:
"YEA, you street turkeys aint gonna be so tough when you've got a buttload of stuffing and pecans on some folks dinner table, are you? ARE YOU!?"
Cracks me up.
