Comment Sections Is Officially Fixed

I swear, this time it works.  I can give no guarantees that the comment section on previous posts will work but I can guarantee it'll work going forward, honest to blog.  Gentleman, Ladies (the few of you I haven't offended away yet), our long national nightmare is over. 

Consider this my gift to all of you for reading and putting up my requests for comments despite the fact that my comment section didn't work all this time.  Who knew the joke was on me.  Here is an edited version of Florida Gators Great Tim Tebow's legendary speech (pictured above):

To the fans and everyone in Alt-Tab Nation (all 60 or so of you), I'm sorry. I'm extremely sorry (I'm not really). I was hoping for a working comment section, that was my goal, something The Alt Tabs has never had.

I promise you one thing, a lot of good will come of this (depends on your definition of a lot, and good). You will never see another blogger blog as hard as I will (for the remainder of the 5 year lease I have on this site).  You will never see another blogger shamelessly beg for guest blogs and comments the way I will beg all of you.

You will never find another blog that will bring your joy the way Alt-Tabs will (just blatantly not true).

God Bless.

Feel free to pop in and drop a comment letting me know how much of an idiot I am (or bash Tim Tebow).

Quick Rant: Are People Really This Clueless?

So I was on a pub crawl this past weekend, and once again (like every pub crawl I've been on or witnessed) there were morons at every other bar who would see the streams of people pouring into bars mid-day, all dressed in similar fashion and have the audacity to ask "whats going on?" or my favorite "am I missing something?". 

Yea you're missing something, common sense.  Yea, me and 700 or so of my closest friends (its a very large and long running pub crawl) all coincidentally wore the same ugly yellow shirt and brought pirate themed accessories out to the bar today.  Oh and that guy over there leading us around looking like Captain Hook? Well he's just a really big fan of his favorite college football team.  Ass bag.  Use your head. If there is one thing I just cannot stand it's peoples blatant displays of ignorance. I just can't fathom why anyone would publicly advertise their general lack of intelligence to a total stranger in such completely obvious situations.

Figures, two white guys on the court and one of them is involved in this disaster. We can't keep blowing chances like this guys.  If you're lucky enough to be offered a chance at an interracial handshake you've got to bring your A-game.  I'm talking full-bodied, minimum of 5 steps, ending with a kiss of your fingers to the sky.  Do you guys want to keep hanging out with just the one or two other white guys on the team, filing tax returns while watching the news in your hotel rooms? Or do you want to be invited to the after game parties, with the Crystal and pimp cups?  Because you just blew that chance for this season.  Probably set race relations back another 10 years in the process.

First Day Back From Vacaction

Yep, that picture pretty much sums up how the first half of my day is about to go.  Monday's after vacation almost make the whole vacation not worth it...Ok that may be a bit of an exaggeration but there is no denying its by far the worst work day you face.  Whether you're fresh off a relaxing long weekend or a fun week off there is no more dreadful feeling than going to bed the night before you're first day back, knowing that on top of the usual annoyances of fluorescent lights, nagging phone calls, and un-ending excel sheets, you'll face two additional perturbances.  1. The full e-mail box, 2. Questions from co-workers you work hard to avoid most weeks asking you what you did.

The Full Email box- Nothing I look forward to more than wasting two hours sorting through emails I'll never need or use.  It's like company spam, except there is no filter for it, and they're not promising me riches from Nigeria or Russian mail order brides.  Just corporate mission statements and questions addressed to everyone at the office because the sender was too stupid and lazy to figure out exactly who they should be emailing.  And what is with people who ignore or don't understand the out of office message?  Without fail I'll receive 5 or 6 client requests while I'm out, with a follow up the next day asking why the task hasn't been completed. WTF? Did you think the out of office response was some sort of elaborate practical joke? Or are you really too dumb to read and comprehend the meaning of the message?

Questions From Co-Workers- Look, there are very few co-workers who I let in and accept as friends, to the rest, I try to be polite and respectful, but ultimately I don't give a shit about your life outside of work as I hope you don't give a shit about mine.  Who has time for all that caring? I have a circle of family and friends that I'm interested in and its at capacity right now.  If someone is cut for one reason or another I'll let every one know and we can have some sort of try out to see who I let in next.  But until then lets just stick to the niceties and leave our non-work lives out of it.  My typical responses to how my weekend was range from "good", "pretty good", or "the usual".  Non-descriptive yet friendly enough that the conversation ends amicably shortly thereafter.  The problem with vacations are everyone wants to pry just a little deeper, but I'm not on board.  So I end up looking like a snob or an asshole because I don't feel like sharing any of the details of my personal life.  The most you're going to get out of me is that I watched football on Sunday. Thats it.  Lets just move on, pretend it was a normal weekend off for me and go about our days.  Leave all the blabbing to girls or guys who like to hear their own voice.