Red Sox Fans Pulse Check: More Injuries, More Wins

See Ya!...No really, see ya. Cody Ross hit the DL yesterday for 6-8 weeks with a broken bone in his foot. So R.I.P the Cody Ross bat flip. We loved it, even if you didn't.

"I'm not trying to show anybody up. It's just a reaction," he reportedly said of his trademark bat flip. "I actually don't like it. I wish I could get rid of my bat a different way, maybe like Lance Berkman, hitting it and setting it on the plate. It just happens."

I love the idea of a guy getting so jacked up after a home run that he basically blacks out for a couple seconds and acts like a complete boss. Makes my day. And frankly, I'm amazed his trip to the DL is completely unrelated to some pitcher finally plunking him. 

In other news, the sox are winners of three in a row and and 9 of 11...so they're on fire. The bats are producing, the starting pitching has righted the ship (Buchholz withstanding), and the bullpen is lights out. How long they can keep it up with five outfielders on the DL, I have no idea. It's to the point now where I'm seriously debating sending a couple of my company softball highlight reels down to Yawkey to see if I can get a spot. I can track flies with the best of them, might be a little light with the bat but my UZR is off the charts. Even if I don't make the big club they could at least stash me in Pawtucket for depth purposes.

And finally, it wouldn't be the Red Sox if there wasn't some manufactured controversy to talk about. Though this time it appears the media and ownership had nothing to do with starting it. David Ortiz took it upon himself to lace into the media yesterday over supposed questions regarding his leadership. 

Listen, maybe we don't know the whole story, maybe someone really offended D.O, or maybe it was a language barrier thing, I don't know. And honestly, I don't care. Has Ortiz gotten an un-fair shake in the past? Yea, maybe. For a guy that should be nothing short of revered around here, he may have a point. Should he act like a whiny brat, throwing temper tantrums? You know what? If that's what he wants to do, while he's batting like this and the team is winning the way they are, then sure. Throw hissy fits all you want, lash out at perceived slights (reality and non-reality alike). He's crushing the ball like 04-05 Ortiz, I'll take it however I can get it. I can dig it. Pedro pulled the same routine for years, constantly making up boogey men who were supposedly disrespecting him, even though he was widely regarded as one of the best pitchers of all time. 

If that does it, then shit, all players should go around playing the respect card, most notably Clay Buchholz...someone pass on this message to him. Hey Clay, you've really sucked lately and I don't respect you. 

That should do it.

Jose Canseco: Striking Out in Worcester, On the Field and Off

Yep, that's actually Jose Canseco's number...and I just called it. But no, he did not answer (definitely not the last time I call today). Still, it didn't go straight to voicemail, it rang a few times, so maybe he's just not up yet, or maybe he's taking some early morning batting practice...or maybe, he finally scored with some lucky Worcester waitress...

Deadspin - At the age of 47, and more than a decade removed from his career as a Major League player, Jose Canseco just won't quit trying to do what he loves the most: hitting on young women. According to a tipster, Canseco has taken a run at "about a half dozen" female employees aged 19-23 at a restaurant he's been frequenting in Worcester, Mass. At one point, Canseco even slipped the phone number you see above to a 19-year-old hostess. So has he been striking out? Says the tipster: "Not even a foul tip...just straight swinging through."

Look, I've been to Worcester a few times, and if there's one thing I know for sure, it's that Jose is not striking out. The man is built like a gorilla. He's your prototypical townie waitress one night stand material. Sure this girl might have taken a pass, but that's probably because he just got done nailing her co-worker/roommate the night before.  Keep plugging Jose, the hits will come...and answer my damn phone calls!

Official Un-Boxing of The Alt-Tab's Brand New Tailgating Grill

Some sites blog the unboxing of various gaming systems, i-phones, tablets, etc..., and some blog tailgating equipment unboxings...This is the latter. See, one thing you have to know about me is that I absolutely love tailgating. Love it. Almost love it more than the event I'm at itself (actually depending on the event there's a solid chance I actually do love the the tailgating more). If Facebook were still a site where you share you interests on your profile, instead of this smorgasbord of food pictures and timelines, my top interest would be cooking and drinking in random parking lots. That's how much I love tailgating. 

As some of you remember, my last grill was stolen by basque separatists post tailgate at an event last year, in an act of international terrorism still unrecognized by NATO. Well, it was a long fall/summer without a grill for the CW, but no more. If the Joint Chiefs won't take action on my behalf, I'll take matters in to my own hands. Yesterday, I rectified that situation. Without further ado, the unboxing:

Pic 1: The Box:

Pic 2: The Packing:

That's right, my baby got wheels, rolling on dubs. 2 inches, that is.

Pic 3: Progress:

Pic 4: The Final Product:

Flat out sexy. It was all I could do not to fire that up right in my kitchen last night. Apparently there are fire codes against that sort of thing, but still, it was tempting. She'll see her first action this Friday, sausage, dogs, burgers, can't wait!

Does this Look like Face of the Lakers GM Watching His Team Crumble in OKC?

H/T for the Gif

Yep, actually that's exactly what the face of the Lakers GM looks like while watching his team crumble in OKC. Nailed it... I mean that tight zoom was like something out of a horror movie. Just a lone suicidal man standing out like a sore thumb in an otherwise ecstatic crowd.

PS: Did this loser buy a single? What is he doing down there and why is no one with him? Don't opposing GM's get box seats somewhere up behind glass? This looks like poor old Mitch was scrambling outside trying to find a solo tick from Oklahoma scalpers. 

The Long Snapper Viral Video Everyone's Talking About

Flat out impressive. Guys want to be him, girls want to be with him...I think anyway, has being a long snapper ever gotten anyone laid before? If any long snapper was ever going to be a panty dropper its this bro. Guy must absolutely run the summer day drinking/bbq circuit, just bringing his circus act to every blockparty around, wrangling groupies and youtube hits in the thousands. 

Honest question, how did he end up at Colgate? Must be a historic long snapping power house is all I can figure, because it's unfathomable that the big time D-1's would have passed him over.  You can follow Nick on Twitter, @arealsonofadich

PS: Another honest question, am I the only one that's never heard of BB & N High school? Is that one of those fake high school prep things where the guys are like 20 years old?

NBA Stars: The Answer to "Who is Tyler Perry's Target Audience?"

That right there is some serious Tyler Perry, Madea Goes to Jail, shit (on a more serious note, it's also Russell Westbrook, you know, one half of the super star OKC Thunder duo who just knocked the Lakers out of the playoffs...keep it real OKC). 

I steadfastly maintain that I've never met anyone who willingly admits they watch any of the Tyler Perry franchises, and now I know why...I generally don't run in circles with NBA stars. It all makes sense now, the ridiculous black rim glasses, the uber-dweeb outfits, Lebron carrying man-purses...it's all the NBA copying Tyler Perry culture. 

PS: No NBA player has looked that good in drag since LJ went all Grandma-ma on us...and Yes I did have his shoes, and yes I did eventually pop the gel cases to see what was in there.