Vancouver and by Association All of Canada Handle Stanley Cup Loss With Class...Whoops, I mean Canada Behaves Like a Bunch of Barbaric Vikings after 2nd Place Finish

Vancouver - Riot police fired teargas to control a crowd burning cars and looting shops in Vancouver after the Canucks lost the Stanley Cup final to the Boston Bruins. Thousands of people had gathered in the city centre in the hope of celebrating the Canucks' first Stanley Cup win, but the party atmosphere disappeared after the Bruins secured a 4-0 victory. The scenes were reminiscent of a riot that erupted when Vancouver lost the Stanley Cup in 1994, as groups of mostly young men threw bottles, attacking parked cars and smashed shop windows. Hospital officials said several people had been treated for stab wounds and many more for exposure to teargas or pepper spray. Police have not released any information on how many people had been arrested.

You'd think for a nation of second place finishers these hosers would be able to handle defeate a bit more graciously  by now, no?  I mean how many more years of being an also-ran country is it going to take for these hosers to accept their place in the world? 

Like this is nothing new, even for Vancouver, I mean you just got finished hosting the Olympics, as far as I know (and I'm not bothering to look this up), ya'll didn't finish first in medals there either.  Probably 2nd or 3rd. You should be used to this finish by now.

Shit, every single day of your lives, you're second place...You go abroad and the first question people probably ask is if you're American.  And admit it, they're a little disappointed when you say "no, just a Canadian." It's depressing. You're a second class North American Citizen...Hell even the name of your continent rubs it in.  We're not hanging out in North Canada, its North America.  

Get used to it guys, things aren't changing anytime soon, take solace in the fact that your 2nd place pole position is secure though, doesn't look like Mexico is going anywhere anytime soon...and I'm pretty sure your pussy hockey team could beat a Mexican squad any day, so you got that going for you.

Huge Night For Black and Yellow Boys From Boston, The Bruins had a Pretty Nice Night Too

So obviously everyone knows how things turned out for the B's last night, went to Canada and beat mercilessly on some hosers and returned with some hardware.  I'm the pinkest of the pink hat bruins fans so I'm not going to wax on here about this victory. I'll just say, thank god.  These are Canadians we're talking about, and not just any Canadians but West Coast Canadians.  Not only are they harmless saps, but they're chill, lazy, harmless saps. Losing to that band of sissy losers would have been the official death knell for this great nation.

While all that was happening and Chara (left) was doing his best Cast Away "I HAVE MADE FIRE" impression, a little known underdog was doing work back in Boston, wrapping up a dream season that no one believed possible.

That's right, the Black and Yellow of the Wednesday Night Mixed-Coed B-Division Indoor Soccer League (The WNMCBDIS if you're tracking at home) shocked the world with a league championship.  

The little team that could, the team that no one gave a chance pulled off the single greatest "no one believed in us" victory the WNMCBDIS has ever seen, one that will go down in the history books and be talked about for a long, long time.  

I'll spare you the details as I promised to stop writing indoor soccer wrap ups a long time ago, but suffice to say this game had much more drama than the Bruins stomping on a bunch of figure skaters throats did. The game was finally won with 5 seconds remaining in OT on a free kick goal from team rookie JB. Shocked, stunned, and relieved (yours truly, CW was filling in net last night, was more than relieved that the game wouldn't be settled over penalty kicks) the jubillant team rode off into the sunset to celebrate and watch their counterparts handle their business out west. And for this blogger, it seemed fitting that both teams adorned in black and gold came through on the same night.  

PS: I have 0 blogs prepared today, so I'm just winging the rest of the day.