Coolio Is Stuck in 1995

LAS VEGAS – Rapper Coolio was arrested Friday on a warrant charging him with failure to appear in court on a traffic ticket almost two years ago. Coolio, 48, whose real name is Artis Leon Ivey Jr., was a passenger in a vehicle officers stopped about 2:20 a.m. several blocks east of the Las Vegas Strip, Officer Laura Meltzer said. No one else in the car was arrested. It was not immediately clear if Ivey had a lawyer. His manager Susan Haber said she had not heard about the incident and had no comment. Ivey was sought on a warrant charging him with failure to appear on an illegal stop and driving without a license summons issued in June 2010.

Honest to goodness question, you think Coolio knows he's no longer the best rapper alive? Like, I know Gansta's Paradise stayed atop the Jamn 94.5 morning countdown for what seemed like forever, but the run did eventually end, I just feel like no one ever told Coolio.

Dude, you're almost 50 years old! Time to ditch the Rudy Huxstable pony tails, grow some real hair and start going by you're real name, Artis Leon Ivey Jr. You had as good a run as anyone's ever had, from Fantastic Voyage to Gangta's Paradise, to 1,2,3,4...but it's over.  You've got more in common with your average AARP card holder now than you do with the Hip-Hop stars of today, plus you wouldn't want any part of these clowns anyway. You were hard, you didn't take shit from anyone, trying to keep up with panzies like Drake just aint worth it. It's time to move on, it's time to become Artis. I wanna remember the Coolio from the video below, not the aging, mostly out of touch, former Rapper who's currently engaged in projects like "Ghetto Hoes: Bitchez 'N The Hood 2 (for real).

Some Ugly Guy Claiming to be Hugh Hefner's Son Arrested for Attacking Playmate

Celebuzz - Trouble at the mansion. Hugh Hefner‘s eldest son Marston Hefner was reportedly arrested for allegedly attacking Playboy’s Playmate of the Year Claire Sinclair. Claire, 20, is Marston’s girlfriend and according to TMZ.com, cops were called out to the Playboy heir’s Pasadena, Calif. pad after a 911 call was made by one of Claire’s family members claiming that Marston attacked the model. A source told the website that cops saw visible bruises on Claire upon arriving on the scene, and that Marston did admit to an altercation with his girlfriend but denied striking her. However, Claire’s story was very different. The TMZ source told the website that she told police “Marston had punched her, kicked her in the stomach and then refused to let her leave the residence.” Marston was arrested at 11:15 p.m. on Sunday night for misdemeanor domestic violence. He was released on $20,000 bail not too long after his arrest. On Monday, Hugh Hefner himself commented on the situation, telling People, “if they care about each other, they’ll patch it up.”

Either this just isn't Hef's son, just some guy taking advantage of a senile old man with a lifetime supply of viagra, or this picture is Hef's son in 1972. What the hell is going on here? The Faux mullet,the gapped teeth, the general gross looking complexion and lack of tan, and the bushy brows...that is most certainly not Hugh Hefner's son...Looks like the milk man may have a few "what happens in the grotto, stays in the grotto" stories from back in the day...

Teacher Throws McDonalds Food Back Through Window With Video

LAKELAND, Florida -- The Polk County Sheriff's Office has arrested a Lakeland teacher for battery after she allegedly threw food at a McDonald's employee. According to investigators, 39-year-old Simone Paolercio was in the drive-thru of a McDonald's on South Florida Avenue Saturday morning when she got into a dispute with the window attendant over her order. They say Paolercio demanded a refund. When the manager refused, she allegedly threw the food through the window, striking the attendant in the face and chest.

The lesson as always...Do not fuck with people's McDonald's. Just don't do it. It never works out in a good way. People are irrationally crazy about their McD's. I can't explain it, science can't explain it, it's just the way it is.

And let me ask this power hungry, McDonald's drive thru manager a question...Was it worth it? Saving the $2.50 her food cost to get covered in soda and cheeseburgers, did you really think that was the right idea? Just fix her fucking order, because here's the thing, the person who took her order over the headset, I guarantee didn't speak English as their first language. Guaranteed. So they fucked it up, like they do roughly 20% of the time, because of the language barrier. Now, we all accept that this is going to happen from time to time. It's part of the deal with going to a fast food drive thru, the quality of food and service sucks, we know that. But we expect any mistakes that we point out to be corrected, and it's really not that difficult, just give me one of the 15 other pre-made burgers you've got just sitting there and I'll be on my way. Don't hassle me for the receipt, don't go over what Juan Pablo Sanchez thought I ordered, just take my word for it and replace my items, that's  all we're looking for.  That's your job as a white shirted employee at McDonald's, fix the mistakes of the non-white shirted employees. If you can't handle that, find another job, or accept that every once in a while, you're going to have a McFlury thrown in your face. 

College Student Accused of Stealing Frozen Pizza, Coat, and Flag...Or as I Call it, Attending a Party

These two have  any balls, they'll wear this shirt to court

Police said two roommates got drunk Monday morning and tried to break into a College Street residence. Iowa City Police Officers responded to 327 E. College St. at 1:56 a.m. Monday for a report of two subjects trying to open a door. Two subjects matching the descriptions given to officers were located next door inside 325 E. College St. Police said the two men, were found to be in possession of a black coat, a Iowa Hawkeyes flag and a frozen pizza, police said.

Talk about getting a bad rap, if a black coat, a flag, and some frozen pizza are all that's missing, I'd say this was a pretty successful party. I mean how many people go home with the wrong coat, or with no coat at all after a normal college party? 5? 10? I'd say at least that many. I don't think I successfully went home with the same coat I walked in with from a single college party ever.  One semester I realized I'd been perpetually leaving my coats at this one kids apartment, and he took them all home for summer break, and I took them all back the next fall...that was the ebb and flow of college. I'm honestly shocked a coat was even reported stolen, you just steal one back. Head down to res-cafe and snag a similar coat of equal or lesser value.

And don't even get me started on the trumped up charge of stolen frozen pizza. I didn't even know you could arrest people for that. I don't think my roommates and I EVER hosted a party where all the frozen food in our freezer wasn't gone by the next morning. It got to the point where we were stocking up the freezer with just worst $.99 frozen pizza's and entree's you could buy because the theft was so prevalent. Joke was on them when they shit their brains out a few hours later. People treat frozen food at a kegger like party favors.

The worst time happened when a couple of drunks ate our frozen pizzas (the good ones this time, Digiorno), and then proceeded to leave a Thank You note on the card board box, which they stuffed into the oven, you know, so it'd be some place we'd be sure to find it...Like the next morning when I was preheating the oven and happened to notice a large chunk of card board chilling in there before it started a 5-alarm fire. 

So what I'm saying here is, any lawyer worth a damn will get these two 'tards off without even breaking a sweat, just go in there make a couple, boys will be boys, college students comments and walk out...