WINDSOR, Ontario – Last month, Bob Dechert, a senior aide to Canada's foreign minister, was dispatched to Detroit with an important diplomatic mission: to stop a highly-annoying noise.
The so-called Windsor hum, described as a low-frequency rumbling sound, has rattled windows and knocked objects off shelves in this border community just across the Detroit River from the Motor City. Locals have said it sounds like a large diesel truck idling, a loud boom box or the bass vocals of Barry White...Even weirder, Americans cannot seem to hear it. Canadians find that suspicious -- especially since their research suggests the hum is coming from the Yankees' side -- and accuse US officials of staying silent over the noise. "The government of Canada takes this issue seriously," Dechert said after his recent fact-finding trip, which included a visit to a heavily-industrialized area on the American side of the river that some Canadian scientists believe is to blame for the hum.
I don't think you could come up with a better quote to accurately describe Canadian Government than this:
"The government of Canada takes this issue seriously," Dechert said after his recent fact-finding trip, which included a visit to a heavily-industrialized area on the American side of the river that some Canadian scientists believe is to blame for the hum.
And that right there, is why no one can take Canada seriously.
I sincerely hope the Mayor, or whatever warlord/strongman is controlling war-torn Detroit these days, tells the Cannucks to go pound sand. Hey Canada, you don't like your neighborhood? Move. No one's forcing you to stay.
If you can't put up with a little bit of humming that apparently may or may not sound like Barry White (which sounds delightful, FYI), move. Go try out Europe. See how you like the Greeks, Spanish, Portuguese, Italians, the entire Easern Bloc, and occassionally the Irish asking you for free cash advances all the time. Better yet, give Africa a shot. I'm sure your Mounted Police and their lack of guns will turn a continent of wild militias right around. Ad try South America, while you're at it. You think a soothing hum is an annoyance? Try and deal with loud speaking latino's everywhere you look.
