American Idol or Celebrity Rehab?

Daily Mail - Nicki Minaj is said to have threatened Mariah Carey after her American Idol co-star called her a 'b****' - it is now being claimed. Show bosses cancelled filming in Charlotte, North Carolina for the day on Tuesday after a huge blow up between the pair where Nicki allegedly threatened and swore at Mariah...Their fellow panellists Keith Urban and Randy Jackson were caught in the middle of the row, according to TMZ, which is running a video of the row, where Nicki can be heard ranting at Mariah. A source told the website: '[Nicki said to Mariah] "I'm gonna knock you out" - although this was not caught on tape.' In the video being run by TMZ, Minaj can be heard saying: 'I told them I'm not f*****g putting up with her f*****g highness over there [Referring to Mariah]. Figure it the f*** out. Figure it out.' Mariah can also be heard answering back in the video - but it is difficult to make out exactly what she is saying.

So here's the video, I can't embed for some reason, anyway...I'm going to have to revisit my opinion that this season of American Idol is going to be unwatchable, it might be the single most entertaining one yet...Not for good reasons like the talent is unreal or Simon and his charming snark are back or anything, but because the show has essentially degraded into a therapy session from Celebrity Rehab with renowned crazy Mariah Carey and crazy in a not so subtle way Nicki Minaj just squaring off nightly. 

Poor Randy Jackson in over his head trying to simultaneously judge the next generation of musical talent with his extremely limited range of vocabulary ("in it to win it" , "gotta have it", "dawg" , "for me it wasn't good" , that's it, those are the only english phrases you need to know to judge a singing competition on national television), and play Dr. Phil for these two nutso's. Then you've got that poor country guy, who literally has no idea what he signed himself up for, but the producers backed a truck full of cash up to his house because The Voice has a country guy so they needed to go get them one to keep up in the ratings, and lets be honest, all male country stars are interchangeable.

It's going to be crazy to say the least.

PS: I'm fully on team Mariah here. Maybe I'm just comfortable with her craziness after having her around for years now, I don't know. I just feel like she spent a decade and a half or so building her right to be certifiable, Nicki just throws on cotton candy for wigs and raps like a demonic toddler and we're supposed to respect her fragile creative mind. I don't think so. I'll take the subtle crazy over the in your face "look at me, I'm crazy" any day of the week.

What Did Randy Jackson Wear?

DON'T CALL IT A COME BACK!  I honestly thought the "Randy Jackson Wore What" series was dead last week. Just didn't even bother with it after Randy threw back to back nights of black leather coats with black shirts at me...had the season of the Plural Tone been cut down far before it's prime?

Answer: A Resounding NO. Not only did Randy come out looking like a loaf of Wonder Bread, he gave us this bonus shot of young(er) Randy doing his thing all the way back in the 80's! It's an Easter Miracle. My spirits are revived and I'm feeling more confident than ever that we can take this thing all the way down to the final two. 

God Bless You, Randy Jackson's stylist.

What Did Randy Jackson Wear?

 

I mean, I'm not happy about this ensemble, that's for sure. It's sucking the life right out of the blog. Yea it follows this years theme of "Plural Tones," but its more like "subtle plurality." 

I didn't think it was possible for a multi-colored tie to be so dull, it flat out sucks. 

The pink watch is hot, though. And it helps settle an internal debate I've been have for a few weeks about whether or not middle age, slightly overweight, very much out of touch, black men can accessorize in pink..."DAWG, YOU JUST KILLED THAT."

What Did Randy Jackson Wear

Honestly, I can't hate on this. I'm not black, so I could never really pull it off myself, but that wouldn't necessarily stop me from mistakenly buying this ensemble under the delusion that it might look good on me. It wouldn't happen now, while I'm all pale and gross from the winter, but lets say mid-summer. I'd have a nice tan by then, and I'd probably think, "hey, I'm dark, I can get away with this."

And then it would sit in the far back corner of my closet forever. 

If you missed any of Randy's previous "Plural Tone" offerings this year, you can find them here, and here.

What Did Randy Jackson Wear?

First off, my bad to everyone for being so late with this, I completely forgot that I'd started doing this until I caught the end of the results show yesterday. And now on to the judging.

Continuing with this years trend of "The Plural Tone" outfits, we have hear the Mr. Rogers meets Dots Candy. Amazing. Frankly, he had the plural tone theme pulled off with just that garrish shirt on its own. He's basically just showing off with that outlandishly bold cardigan. 

This is from the results show, and I'm not gonna lie, Randy, this is the first time you've let me down this season.  Yea you've still got the tri-tone going, but the spirit is missing. There's nothing bold here, there's nothing show-offy. It's just a middle aged man who appears to have stolen Justin Biebers jeans and stole a homeless clowns jacket. No effort to be original and ground breaking whatsoever. 

Look, I don't want to discriminate like this, but there's no way around it. Skinny Jeans aren't for candidates who've had lap-band surgery. They're just not. They look ridiculous on skinny emo-asians with bad hair cuts, they look REALLY ridiculous on middle age black men who vaguely remind me of tyrannosaurus-rex (I can't explain it, he just does. Just one of those things where you look at someone and immediately associate like, a frog or a horse or some kinda creature with them).

I'm expecting A LOT better tonight Randy, don't let me, or my following down...it's really not a tall order.

Jermaine Jones Being Kicked Off Idol for Hiding Criminal Past

TMZ - Jermaine Jones will be kicked off "American Idol" Wednesday night, after producers learned he concealed the fact that he was arrested twice last year and has outstanding warrants ... TMZ has learned. As we first reported, producers discovered Tuesday that Jermaine had lied about his criminal history and that triggered the decision to confront him on camera Tuesday afternoon. We're told one of the incidents involved violence, which was particularly troublesome to producers. He also lied to cops by giving them fake names both times he was arrested.

First off, if you're following Idol this season and don't want any spoilers, don't read the title to this post or look at the picture above...

But since I'm guessing you've already done both, you might as well follow along as I spin a little tale of an American Idol Conspiracy Theory. 

Yesterday, when I first heard that Idol would be kicking someone off for their criminal past my mind immediately raced as to who it could be. I skipped right over all of the black contestants as years of white guilt have taught me to do (because obviously if I assume that it's the gigantic hulking black guy first, I'm a racist), so I pinned it on one of the older blonde girls, maybe one of them had a crystal meth problem, who knows? 

Wrong. It was Jermaine. And then my mind started turning. "Wait a minute, Jermaine's the one they initially cut, and then brought back to create the "Top 13," even though he sucks." And I mean, really sucks. Sucks so bad that I've fast forwarded after listening to the first 30 seconds of each of his last 3 songs. Yea, it's a nice deep voice, but unless you're singing the theme song to some Disney animated movie, there's just no place for that voice. I couldn't figure out why the judges kept him. 

Until yesterday, it all makes sense now. Feeling pressure from rivals The Voice and Simon Cowell's X-Factor, the Idol producers needed to do something to set themselves apart, and that's exactly what they got here. A chance for a twist and a surprise shake up when they have to send one of their own home for criminal transgressions and outstanding warrants (and Jermaine, if you have outstanding warrants, maybe entering a nationally televised competition isn't the best way to hide yourself). Boom, you've just hijacked the news cycle for at least a week, obliterated the voice, and stolen the "edgy" title from X-factor in one move. 

And you would have gotten away with it scot-free, if it wasn't for this one blogger with a wild imagination. 

New Feature: What Did Randy Jackson Wear Last Night?

Two Words: Game Changer. Randy Jackson's outfits have been absolutely on fire this season. This right here is just a selection of his last three, and he's Killing It, Dawg! Lebron and Dwayne Wade take note, this is how you dress. You gotta own it. And yes, I'm going to be tracking Randy's outfits right here each week from here on out, this kinda fashion mogulery deserves its own feature.

Picture one is probably the best illustration of Randy's theme this season you're gonna see, The Plural Tone. That's right, Plural. Randy is sure as hell not settling for two-tone, but he's not going to be painted into a box as just a quad-tone or just a tri-tone dresser either. 

Picture One - Classic Quad-Tone, in your face, not at all subdued, fire. That's how I'd describe it. Sadly, I'm fairly certain white people such as myself will never pull off  a shirt with that kind of flair. 

Picture Two - The Subtle Tri-Tone.  It's not a great picture, but yes, that is fur on the collar of Randy's jacket. Brown fur. On a black jacket...I know what you're thinking, that shouldn't go at all. And yet, when Randy throws it on, I don't know, he just looks like a dignified version of Shaft, crossed with Colin Powell (though I think that's mostly because of the glasses).

Picture Three - Mista Raja's Neighborhood. Yes, that is a button down sweater vest with cream colored sleaves sewn to it (so I guess it's not technically a vest?). Yes he is pulling it off. Yes, Jennifer Lopez looks absolutely stunning.  Honestly, bad move by Randy here, because that outfit is gold, but he let himself get upstaged here. I mean, I was going to crop J-Lo out, but I just couldn't. 

My question, is Randy concocting these things himself? I can almost picture him sewing on the flair to a normal blue shirt, sewing on that fur patch, and stitching cream colored sleaves onto his sweater vest. Shouldn't this be a behind the scenes look from Idol? Like screw these contestants bland, already been done back stories, lets go behind the scenes on Randy's wardrobe, that's whats hot.