You know what? It's ok. Yes, I'm disappointed, and yes, watching these guys come off the court, their faces full with the painful realization that this might all be over was emotional to see. But it's ok.
I'm not mad, I'm not upset, I don't feel like I got cheated as a fan. I don't have that coulda, woulda, shoulda feeling. I can't ever remember feeling like this after one of our teams suffered a major loss. There's always the standard routine of avoiding thinking/talking/watching/reading sports for a solid week or two after and then slowly dipping back in to the sports world, like the first time you get in a pool, testing it with your toes, then your foot, then up to your knees....I haven't done that this time. I've done quite the opposite.
I've dived head first straight in. I didn't hesitate in watching Sportscenter the next day, didn't hesitate in reading the local sports sections or listening to the talk radio shows. In fact, I've actively sought out every column, highlight, bit of information I could find on these Celtics...Like I'm hoarding an era's worth of highlights and memories as fast as I can.
I don't want to forget this team. I want to remember as much as I can about them, even in defeat.
Despite the brutal game 6 loss, and the clincher in game 7 when they just didn't have enough, I want to remember these guys. I'm still proud of these guys. There was never a feeling that they quit, never a feeling that they didn't give a shit, never a feeling that the fans may have wanted this more than the players. That last one might be the most important.
As fans, fair or unfair, we often project our wants, our hopes, or desires onto complete strangers and when they disappoint, we read their body language, read their effort, and decide if they gave everything that we'd give. I don't have to do that here. I know they wanted it, and if I didn't know, I saw it on their faces when they came off the court Saturday. This meant everything to them.
This was like your last game as 12 year old in little league. It's your first prolonged team experience as a kid, you'd played with all the other 12 year olds for three seasons, you'd gotten to know the 11 year olds, you're more or less comfortable with each other. You know who your team can depend on, and who you cant, you knew each others habits...You just knew each other, unlike other sports up until that point it wasn't a one and done, re-draft next year thing. And suddenly, it ends one summer. Off to the big fields with the bigger kids, new teammates, new coaches, new era.
As a fan watching on the outside that's what this looked like to me. As pure a team in every sense as there ever has been, watching the seconds run down, realizing that for the first time in 5 years, they have no idea what's to come next...But strangely, that's what makes it ok for me.
It's not time, as a fan, to sit back and armchair coach, figure out how it could have gone down differently, and find someone to point blame at. It's time to appreciate what we just witnessed, what we just had, and what, I hope, is back next year. One of those rare sports teams that leaves an indelible memory with you, a team I fully believe I'll be judging all future Celtics teams against. A team I'll miss if that really was their last time together, but a team I'm immensely proud of for giving everything they had.
Here's to the 2012 Boston Celtics. It was a damned good run.
