The Week - Though parents fret over virtually every aspect of child-rearing, few topics inspire more anguish than sex. Some moms and dads insist on abstinence, but, according to ABC News, an increasing number of parents are letting their teenagers do it... at home. One mom, Patty Skudlarek, told Good Morning America that if her 18-year-old son is going to have sex, she wants him to get off in the safety of his own bedroom, "as opposed to a motel, a car or a park, or wherever they're doing it these days." Are these parents being too permissive?
Don't do it kids, it's a trap. These shrewd parents may have just come up with possibly the most diabolical cock-block the world has ever seen....Parental permission to have sex at home.
There's probably a lot of teenagers nodding along at home saying "yea I wish my parents were like this." No you don't, little Timmy, no you don't.
Run this scenario down: You're hanging out with your best gal at the Olde Towne Ice Cream Shoppe, had a couple malted milk shakes, played a bit of footsy, now you're both feeling frisky. You tell her to come back to your house, your parents are "cool with it." She goes along, you get in the door, make a bit of small talk with your dad, turn to head up the stairs to your room and bump into your mom. After the usual chit chat she asks you what you're up to. You respond with the standard "just hanging out." But mom's not dumb, this is exactly what she planned for. From here this can go any number of ways depending on the evil genius level your parents are at:
1. She throws out a knowing wink, and throws here hand up top for a high five while making a "whooop-whooop!" sound. Your virginity is still dead in the water.
2. She throws out something really embarrassing, something only parents can cook up during their spare time- my best guess? She yells back to your father to see if he had the talk with you to give you pointers on "lasting longer" and "special techniques." You might as well go home schooled the rest of high school.
3. An awkward conversation with your hunny about what positions she prefers and how many partners she's had. If you're truly unlucky she'll share some of her experiences with your gf...12 to 6 buddy, 12 to 6.
