Police Determine Lawrence Mayor Wily Lantigua Made Up Story of Attempted Hit and Run

LAWRENCE (AP) - Lawrence police have determined that there is no evidence to support Mayor William Lantigua's claim that someone tried to run him down in a car in front of city hall last month. Chief John Romero said Tuesday no charges will be filed as a result of the March 30 incident and the case is closed. The Eagle-Tribune says the investigation report was delivered to Lantigua's office on Tuesday. Lantigua did not respond to the newspaper's requests for comment. Lantigua told police two white men in a car were watching him and an aide and taking pictures. The car then sped away, nearly striking Lantigua. He reported the incident a day later. Witnesses told police say they saw the car, but did not see it try to run down the mayor.

This story makes 0 sense, yet at the same time it makes complete sense, if that's possible.

Zero sense in the case that, why on earth did Wily go through the trouble of making this batshit crazy story up? Did he feel his city was getting too boring and needed to spice shit up? Like there isn't enough stuff going on in Lawrence for the cops to handle, why not create some caper straight out of a Hardy Boys novel.  Because muggings, car theft, insurance fraud, arson and the occasional violent crime aren't enough to keep these cops busy I guess.

And it makes complete sense because, well, it's Wily Lantigua.  The guy has been a controversial political figure for like a decade now, with no clear support base outside of free Hispanic daily newspapers and an Army of presumably unregistered and undocumented illegals.  Seriously, who else would vote for this swindling, cheating, bone bag? The guy is easily the least qualified Mayor in the history of Mayors. Just one horrible, controversial misstep after another.  No matter though, just smile and wave during the ethnic parades and you'll keep your place in office Wily.