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| You're one step closer...And I'm now probably one step closer to being shut down. |
So by now everyone's heard about BYU Brandon Davies dismissal from the 3rd ranked BYU basketball team for premarital boinking, apparently a violation of the Mormon schools honor code. I had every intention of blogging this yesterday but just got side tracked, and since rehashing it a day late couldn't be lamer, I'm just going to go a different route. I decided to think back and track how many of the schools Honor Code Standards I break on a normal day. A complete list of the code can be found here, but for the purposes of this blog, a quick run down:
- Abstinence from drugs, alcohol, tobacco, coffee, and tea
- Honesty
- Encouraging others to keep the Honor Code
- Living a chaste life (no porn or indecent material,premarital sex, homosexual behavior)
- Obey the law
- Active participation in church
- Respect for others
- Clean Language
- Following Residential Living Standards
- Dress and grooming standards (clean shaven)
- No guns on campush (seems out of place but its on there)
So what did I find? I found that I break about 95% of these laws by the time I'm done breakfast, and I'm not exagerrating, lets count them:
7:45 AM - Wake up, next to my girlfriend I live with, yep we're "living in sin" (1), swear at alarm clock (2), not exactly encouraging my girlfriend not to sleep in the same bed as me so there goes encouraging others (3), actively participating in church couldn't be further from my mind (4), have a cup of coffee (5) respect others, HA, have you been reading my blog?(6), my morning blog homework sometimes involves me stumbling across indecent and pornographic material, can't help it, the internet is an evil place (7), and finally, I only shave for work twice a week (8).
Boom, 8 down and I haven't even left my apartment yet. Usually grab a bagel or sandwich on the way at Dunks, this often times involves me parking illegally in front of fire hydrants or in handicap spots (9). Get to work, tell my client the reason they can't find the report they're looking for is due to technical reasons, a lie (10).
And we're done, I can bang out 10 out of the 11 honor code violations before 10:30 AM during my average day. The only thing stopping me from hammering out all 11 is the fact that I'm about as far from a gun nut as you can possibly get, and apparently the Mormons are too, which we should all be thankful for. I may not agree with much of the Mormon way of life, but it seems we both agree that religious zealots and gun enthusiasts are a terrible combination.
