Vanity Plate Leads to Arrest

MANCHESTER, N.H. – Police say a New Hampshire woman charged with robbing a pharmacy wasn't hard to find: Her name was on the license plate of the getaway car. Police say a motorist watched the woman flee from a Rite Aid parking lot in Manchester. The witness also reported seeing the woman toss items from her car Friday morning. The vanity plate read "B-USHER." Police tell WCVB-TV that the car was registered to 43-year-old Bonnie Usher, who was arrested at her home. Police recovered stolen money and found a ski mask tossed from the car. An official at the Hillsborough County Jail says Usher was being held Sunday night on $60,000 bail. The jail's paperwork did not indicate whether she had retained a lawyer.

Little known fact, New Hampshire (Boston's largest suburb) has the second most vanity plates per capita in the nation.  For a suburb who's motto is "live free or die" giving off a strong minimal government vibe, their citizens sure make it easy for their government to track them down when necessary.  Certainly makes police work easier, no more asking witnesses for make and model of the car,  just have to ask if the redneck put their name or any other cutesy phrases on the back of the car.  

It must really work to curb road rage and speeding infractions though.  I'd be far less tempted to piss off other drivers on the road if I knew they could identify me by my license plate.  Certainly wouldn't be flipping people off at every perceived slight anymore.

Man's Committment To Sandwiches Pushed To New Level

(NewsCore) - Hunger beat out the hospital for one Connecticut man. Shot twice near the groin, New Haven resident Miguel Soto III had a choice: Eat the sandwich he just bought, or rush to the emergency room just a block away. He headed home, sat down in the kitchen and polished off the hero before asking his dad for a ride to Yale-New Haven hospital, WVIT-TV reported late Wednesday.

Sadly, in yet another example of poor, sloppy journalism, the site does not report the two most vital pieces of information at play here though.  What kind of sandwich was it? And where did he get it from (seriously this sub shop should have a huge billboard that just says good enough to die for)?  

I'm going to rule out just about any kind of cold-cut sandwich because no man would be that ridiculous.  Has to be hot and has to be toasted.  I initially thought steak but then reconsidered,  good steak tip or steak and cheese subs are really a dime a dozen.  Each city has a claim to the best and for the most part they're all the same, can't be that.  Same argument goes for chicken parm, anyone can make a good one.  Meatball sub would be a good contender, but anyone that's ever heated up the leftovers to a meatball sub knows its almost as good cold or reheated as it was when it was piping hot.  

This leaves really only one option in my mind, the Thanksgiving Sub.  Its the pinnacle of sub-making and not every sub shop even attempts to make it.  Takes just the right balance of turkey and stuffing to protect the bread from becoming mush from the cranberry sauce and gravy.  When it's perfected, there is nothing better, dare I say worth dying for. Yep, that's gotta be it. 

Crazy Euro Teens

I don't think I've watched an Internet video before that made me feel more sick.  I've skydived twice and I felt more like throwing up watching these crazy assholes walking on girders 900 feet up than I ever did either of those times.  Just insane. 

I'm scared as hell of whatever country they're from.  Just fearless bastards.  Make a note Obama, do not piss whatever country these kids are from off. 

What Was This Guy Thinking?

(NewsCore) - Four days after Georgia Bloomberg, the daughter of New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg, took a terrifying spill from a horse that left her with a concussion and a fractured vertebra, the billionairess's boyfriend dumped her, the New York Post reported Sunday.
Olympic speed-skating gold-medalist Joey Cheek, who graced the cover of a Wheaties box, fell for Hizzoner's youngest daughter at a Fashion's Night Out event in September.


 Dude, you're a male ice skater, it doesn't even matter that you were in the Olympics, I'm pretty sure I make more money than you do.  Disney on Ice can't pay that well.  Shes a frigen billionaire's daughter! This guy had it, the rare chance to be a gold digging man.  You stick with this chic while she rehabs from a spinal injury and she'd basically have to marry you with out a prenup.  You could have been swimming in a pool of gold coins ala Scrooge within one year.  But nope, Joey Cheek is an idiot.


So not only did you give up presumably your only chance not to end up serving coffee at Starbucks once this whole skating fantasy flames out, you've also ostracized yourself from the female community.  There's not a female in the country that is going to get within 15 feet of you after you left this innocent, defenseless girl all on her own when she needed you most.  If she can't keep you around during the hard times with her billion dollar checkbook what chance would  any average girl have?  Its gonna be a long lonly life Joey, a long lonely life.

Jessica Simpsons Downhill Spiral Continues

 

PEOPLE - Touchdown! Jessica Simpson and free agent NFL player Eric Johnson are getting married, a rep confirms to PEOPLE...As for Johnson, who's played for the San Francisco 49ers and the New Orleans Saints, the 6' 3" Needham, Mass., native has excelled at sports since he was a kid. At 13, he hit a hole in one on the golf course, and he broke 11 school records while playing wide receiver for Yale University. He's also a former academic All-American. 

This poor thing.  Who would have thought 5 years ago that Nick Lachey would win this break up, the guy does nothing as far as I can tell and still bagged a hott chic (announcing his engagement to Vanessa Minnillo earlier this week).  But Jessica, good God, have some respect.

Her career and anything to do with her personal life has been in free fall ever since her divorce (everything except her waste line I guess).  From Pop Star and Married with reality show, to divorcee with somewhat of a country career (we can be honest, its a big step down from pop), to dating NFL qb's, to making appearances after apparently eating an entire Thanksgiving dinner (picture above), and now to this.  Engaged to a former back up NFL tight end?  That's as slumming it as it gets for a former Hollywood Pop-Star.  Never thought she'd become more of a train wreck than Britney.  Just a strange weird world Hollywood is.

Great Advertising Dude

Saw this beauty this past weekend, knew I had to take a picture.  I have to wonder how no one talked him out using his name for the company though? I'd imagine the workers show up hiding their faces like criminals when the media tries to video tape them.

I, like most sane people I imagine, would never shop with Dick Touchy-Feely over here for car insurance, but I know who would.  Diddlers and Pervs.  Without knowing anything about this guys business I can guarantee he is the number one insurer of panel vans (otherwise known as rape mobiles).

Alt-Tabs

Slumdog Soldier - A reality television series that offers the winner the chance to serve as an Indian army peacekeeper is attracting huge numbers of aspiring soldiers, The Australian reported Friday.

Sounds thrilling. Whats second prize? A chance to live in a real life Haitian village?


Don't forget to update your status - A Florida teenager was arrested late Sunday after burglarizing a home and forgetting to log off of his MySpace account on one of the home’s computers, the South Florida Sun-Sentinel reported.

Why can't anyone go about their daily business these days without updating the rest of us to their status? You're not that interesting. What could he possibly have had to say? "Just committed a first class  B&E, LOL."  I just hope for his sake they get wifi or at least 3g service in prison. Wouldn't want to miss out on any potential updates or tweets from the big house like, "Mush again for dinner" or "anal rape is the worst."


Google Starts War (no really, a real one) - First, Google Search. Then, Google News. Now . . . Google Wars? Google Maps is fixing an error in its map of Central America that gave Nicaraguan commanders an excuse to invade a disputed area also claimed by Costa Rica.

The bigger question, does anyone actually care what goes on in Nicaragua and Costa Rica? Apparently not since we've just collectively decided that it can be the Beta testing ground for viral web wars.  And who knew Nicaragua would take the internet so seriously?  Most people just sound off on message boards and comment sections annonymously when they're instigated, apparenly Nicaraguans are just more cutthroat than the rest of us.


Fired over Facebook - In what labor officials and lawyers view as a ground-breaking case involving workers and social media, the National Labor Relations Board has accused a company of illegally firing an employee after she criticized her supervisor on her Facebook page.

Shit you can get fired for that?  Good thing I only gripe about my job on my personal blog. I'd be in some serious trouble.



Hate Waiting? - A nation renowned for the art of queuing may be losing its patience, a survey has shown, with the average British adult able to stand in line for only 10 minutes and 42 seconds before tempers start to fray.  The most loathed lines were in supermarkets, followed by the Post Office and airport check-in and security.

10 minutes?! My temper flares if I'm forced to come to a complete stop at an intersection.  And forget the post office (my views on that here), I can't even wait for the ATM.  If I see a person in line at the ATM I just drive off or walk out.  I'm not waiting 30 seconds for you to conduct your transaction.


OH YEA, TANNING BEDS, YEA - One of Russia's most notorious prisons will soon install sunbeds to improve the health of its inmates, its head said on Tuesday.  Styled as a brick fortress, the 19th century Butyrka prison in central Moscow has held a slew of notable figures behind its bars, from persecuted Soviet-era writers Alexander Solzhenitsyn and Isaak Babel to Adolf Hitler's nephew Heinrich.

What happened to the Russia I knew and Loved? Where is the Steel Curtain, the Iron Fist.  The Russia I knew didn't even have jails, they just shipped out prisoners to the cold woods of Siberia, by the time the inmates were able to walk back to civilization their time was up.  Death sentences were for those too weak to make the journey home.  Now they're providing tanning beds?  Crazy world we live in.

Today's Inspirational Video

Actually, more like today's evidence that hurdles probably shouldn't be an option for girls. 

Gripes of the Week

What better blog for a Friday than a list of gripes I've accumulated over the last week or so.  I'd title it Grinds My Gears but I'm guessing I'd get hit with a lawsuit from Seth McFarlane (If he could find my site), and we here at The Alt-Tab couldn't handle that at this point.

-Why are there so many check out aisles at Target?  Seriously, there are at least 20 at any Target I've been to yet I've never seen more than three open.  Doesn't matter the time of day or how busy the store is, three is the best you're going to do.  And you just know this means you're getting stuck behind someone that decided Target was a good place to buy their entire wardrobe for the year.  Don't even bother trying to change lanes, the other two are just as bad, probably someone haggling over a price check and the final one buying back to school items (it doesn't matter the time of year in Target, they are always running deals on back to school items and dorm furniture, it's one of the bigger mysteries in retail sales out there).

-Why don't car washes advertise half off specials on rainy days?  Their current options are close or open with no business, why not get some customers in at half price?  Its not like it costs them anything.  I'd dare say car washes have the biggest mark-up of any car related service, its just an intricate hose and some dish soap, you could charge $2 a car and probably turn a profit.  I'd take them up on the offer.  Sure rain appears to clean your car, your hood, trunk and windows all look clean, but 9 times out of 10 the sides still look like shit.

-Does any other kind of store cause more arguments between couples and cause more heartburn in general than supermarkets?  Between the crowds, the people with carriages stuffed so high they can't see around them, the insane lines at the deli, and the fact that the aisles are wide enough for exactly 1.5 carriages causing chaos all over the store, its enough to stress anyone out.  Couples arguing over what to get, how much to get, and the most efficient way to get the hell of out their quickly.  And finally the checkout clerks who ask if I have a stop n' shop card like its some kind of exclusive club. No I don't have the stupid card, now just swipe the store copy and give me the discount like you always do. Damn.

-Parents bringing their kids to the store and letting them run free like its a playground or day care.  This applies mainly to Walmart but can be applied to grocery stores and Target as well.  The offenders tend to be of foreign descent, but there is also a smattering of white trash hillbillies that do this too, depending on your location.  How about doing some parenting? Or at the very least leave them at home, turn on the TV or XBox, or even tell your fat 10 year old son to go outside and get some real exercise for an hour or so while you run to the store.  I'm stressed enough that I have to pay something ridiculous like $50 for a pack of razors, I don't want to have to bob-and-weave around all of your unruly children so you can wander the store looking for roll back prices.  

-Finally, day light savings doesn't save shit.  The sun is glaring into my cube from 3-3:30 every day and its dark by 4pm.  That shit is depressing.  I literally spend an hour a night just thinking about how much it sucks to get out of work in the dark.  It's one of the more unproductive hours of my day, all due to day light savings time.

What are your gripes? Leave some in the comments section.