Morning Weather Wake Up: Sexually Frustrated Weather Woman

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Oh, Gross Dude!  I can hear your heavy breathing, I know what you're doing.  Closest this guy's came to a woman in a long time I'm guessing, unless you count his mom who's basement he undoubtedly lives in.

Yep that's right, starting the day off right with low brow jokes.

Not Enough Women In Congress? We Should Be So Lucky

Yea, Uganda Looks like a great place to live and raise kids.

Philly Inquirer - With last weekend's inauguration of Dilma Rousseff as Brazil's first female president, the United States fell farther behind the hemisphere's trend toward diverse, inclusive government. The disparity is important because women in power are more likely than men to push policies that promote equality. Brazil's election stands in stark contrast to our November congressional elections, after which the number of women holding seats and leadership positions declined. Furthermore, five women have become elected heads of state in Central and South America since 1990, while not one woman has been a major party's presidential nominee in the United States.  The United States is ranked 72d for female legislative representation, below Cambodia, Ecuador, Mozambique, and Uganda. The share of state governors who are women is less than in Ecuador, Chile, Honduras, and Panama.

Before I get rolling let me stress that I'm in no way opposed to females in politics, the men in congress need some kind of distraction (I jest). My objection to this article is strictly based on the argument laid forth by the author, because it is ridiculous.

Really Stephanie McNulty? You've chosen to hang your hat on Uganda, Mozambique, Ecuador and a few other anonymous 3rd world countries?  Those are your shining beacons of equality and the pinnacles of democractic stability that you've chosen as the foundation for your argument.  Take a look at that picture above, does that pile of squalor look like a place that has their politics figured out? 

Couldn't just be that there weren't as many qualified or distinguished woman running for office as you'd like to think huh? Or that instead of blindly voting along gender lines people in this country weigh the candidates stance on issues (or at the very least judge them on who's commercials they liked better)? 

The whole piece lacks water because there are no restrictions in place to prevent women (qualified or reality tv stars alike) from running for office just like everyone else.  The idea (and it seems like this is what you were getting at) that our government should be made to proportinately reflect society is a strictly european socialist idea (and yea their education systems and economies are doing so much better than ours right now/sarcasm). 

But please let me know when your big move to Cambodia is, we'll arrange a fancy send off and everything.  And then the rest of us will go back to our much better lives in American, despite the lack of elected women officials.

Stock Tips from 50 Cent - Meet My New Financial Advisor

So 50 Cent has been tweeting up a storm this past week about TVG's stock (HNHI symbol) example:

TVG's stock went from 5cent to 10 in one day. You can double your money right now. Just get what you can afford.less than a minute ago via
50cent

My question, do I follow this advice? The logical side of me says no, he's a rapper and a walking brandname, he's simply endorsing the stock because they'll be pushing a new product of his soon. Do I really need to be taking advice from someone who's biggest contribution to society was the chorus to Ayo Technology?

The illogical side says "hey, he has way more money than you'll ever have, he has to know something right?" Sad thing is I think the illogical side is winning.  I mean the guy was a founding partner in Vitamin Water.  It's frigen colored sugar water and the shit blew up. I'm literally drinking one right now. If the guy was savvy enough to get in early on that who am I to question his lead now?  Sure it's a penny stock that could be delisted any day and no one would really notice, but so what.  Guy is an investment mogul. 

Screw it, yes. Someone get me Chuck Schwab on the phone, I have an order to place. 

Chilean Miners Heading Back to the Mine - The Dream Is Over

Some of the 33 miners who spent a record 69 days trapped underground in Chile say they have no choice but to go back to the pits. The miners became global media stars after they survived more than two months in a tunnel, 622m below the surface at a copper mine in Chile's northern Atacama desert. Some say they want to change jobs and are thinking of becoming fruit sellers or motivational speakers, while others admit they will have to return to work as miners. Four of the miners, Reygadas, Segovia, Edison Pena and Carlos Bugueno recently lost their disability pay for failing to undergo medical checks due to constant trips abroad as they enjoyed their newfound fame.

The Chilean miners are about to get their comeuppance for the little hoax they pulled on the entire world.  Just like the 7 Dwarves found out, the fairy tale lifestyle can't last forever, sooner or later you're going to end up back in the mines. 

It took a while but the world finally caught on to the whole scheme.  Collecting disability while you're off touring the world, wearing sunglasses at night like celebrities, crooning on late night shows, pretending not to speak English, and running marathons.  Those aren't things disabled people do guys.

I'm just thankful these phonies aren't from the United States.  You get trapped in a mine and survive here and you'll collect disability for life, doesn't matter if the whole thing was one big trick.  Not in Chile, they play for keeps.  Two and a half months trapped in a mine = 2 and a half months of disability pay.  Now get back to work, and leave my late night TV programming alone. 

Anyone Else HATE Their Condo Association? - Rant

Serious question for any of you who happen to be on a condo board or god forbid are the condo president for their building, just how much were you picked on as a child? No seriously, when you signed up to be the hall monitor in grade school did you think it would help you make friends?  GET A LIFE.

I live in a very quiet, very respectful condo building. Everyone keeps to themselves, you rarely hear a peep from your neighbors unless you pass each other walking in and out, and I can't remember ever hearing a loud party or music late night.  About the only noise you do hear on occasion is someones door closing, or one of the hallways doors coming to a close.  This noise is nothing ridiculous, its just an echo because our hallways are hardwood.  Could it be a minor nuisance? I guess so, but its nothing that you can hear over the television or anything.   Still, I walked out of my unit yesterday to find this on the door way to the lobby.  Now I'm pretty sure its not aimed at my unit, but we've had run ins here with the association previously over some ludicrous complaints so it annoyed me all the same.  Basically their complaints always come down to visitors.  Two things here; 

1) You live in a frigen condo building! This was your choice, if you didn't want to be aware of your neighbors comings and goings or share hallways withe everyone you should have bought a house, so suck it up and go pet your cat. 

2) Just because you don't have friends who are willing to visit you (or friends at all I'm guessing) doesn't mean the rest of us want to live solitary, hermit like lifestyles, talking to our pets, scheming ways to get back at anyone who ever slighted us in life, and sending mass e-mails to the tenants outlining rules for our every day life. Fuck off. 

Signed,

Everyone in the building that had friends growing up.

Alt-Tabs

Tiger Kills Chinese Bus Driver - A rare Siberian tiger attacked and killed a tour bus driver in northern China while the man's horrified passengers watched, Chinese media reported. The tiger pounced on driver Jin Shijun and dragged him into the forest after he got out to check on his bus, which was stuck in the snow at the world's largest Siberian tiger breeding base in the northern province of Heilongjiang, the official Xinhua News Agency said.

Ahh, suddenly the Fung Wha death trap buses between Boston and NY make a little more sense.  I always wondered how all those people could pile on day in and day out for that harrowing journey but I get it now.  Break downs, roll overs, and the occasional collision seem relatively safe when you're used to seeing your driver get eaten for a post-coitous snack by a couple tigers in heat .

Myspace Faces Downsizing -News Corp.'s struggling social network MySpace is bracing for a “dramatic” downsizing that could slash up to half of its workforce. MySpace has been slammed by the surging popularity of Facebook, the social-networking leader. Its November unique visitors of 54.5 million was dwarfed by Facebook’s 151.7 million unique visitors.


Do you think Tom (myspace founder) ever sits up at night plotting revenge against Mark Zuckerberg.  If/When Myspace officially goes under Mark better watch his cornhole, I'm sure there are one or two registered sex offenders in his neighborhood who are just hardcore devoted Myspace fans, and they're going to be pissed about losing their biggest breeding ground.


Kid Eats Sheriffs Cruiser Seat -  Perhaps 18-year-old Jesse Ray Stewart got the wrong message with Crime Dog McGruff's national "Take a Bite Out of Crime" campaign. While a Pasco County Sheriff's Office deputy was taking Stewart to the Land O' Lakes Jail on Sunday after he was arrested on a burglary charge, Stewart took a bite -- actually several -- out of the patrol car's seat, sheriff's officials say.


The schnozberries taste like schnozberries.  Hey kid, way to play it cool, there is no way they know you've been taking pychedelics.


New York Still Bitching About the Snow Storm -  Another storm is taking aim at New York City, where Mayor Michael Bloomberg is still under fire for slow cleanup of a stubborn winter blast that kept streets clogged for days and delayed trash pickups, causing uncollected garbage to pile up for more than a week.


Frigen New York, still bitching about that snow storm?  It was like two weeks ago, get over it.  Greatest city in the world my ass. Couldn't even handle the first snow storm of the year without the whole city turning into the Staten Island Dump? This is legit embarrasing, even a mild tard like Menino can figure out how to hire plow drivers, how can't a multi-billionaire like Bloomberg get this straighened out?

Today's Rappers and Hip-Hop Artists Lack the Class of The Past

Has anyone else noticed the declining class and status of todays hip-hop acts compared to those of even just a decade ago? These guys and gals are legit vagabonds. Despite their supposed millions you can hardly see the difference between them now and the hood-rat low-life's they grew up as.  Shit is ridiculous.


I started pondering this the other day when I heard the 5th song in a row on Jamn 94.5 where the "artist" referenced drinking patron.  Now don't misunderstand me here, there is nothing wrong with Patron.  It is as fine a Tequila as you'll come across and I'm personally a huge fan, but shouldn't these supposedly ultra-rich rappers and divas be flaunting their lettuce with something a bit more expensive.  What happened to magnums of Crystal just being popped left and right in these videos.  No offense to the Young Money crew or anyone else but I'm not exactly impressed with you sipping on the same brand of tequila that I have stored in my freezer.  Again, nothing wrong with it, but it would be like rapping about cruising in a Saab 9000 or Acura TL, fine cars, but not exactly the Phantoms and Murcielagos we expect to hear about.  

Where are the Diddy's and Jay-Z's of this generation.  Dudes who dressed in clothing even white people could get jealous of, none of this baggy t-shirt and Nike kicks shit that any wannabee gangster 12 year old can rip-off at his local Target. Timbs and a Jean Jacket don't count either.  True Moguls, guys that won't be broke in 10 years when there record contract runs out and Mookie, Ray-Ray, and LaTisha have sucked their funds dry. 

Homeless Drunk In England To Be Given Designated Drunk Zones

The Telegraph - The so-called "wet-zone" would allow problem drinkers to be given somewhere where they are free to consume alcohol without fear of being moved on by police, but away from shoppers and tourists. The zones are popular in cities in the United States where they have been used successfully to keep drunks away from areas that are popular with visitors. In Colchester, Britain's oldest recorded town, the drinkers have already been moved on from the grounds of the historic 11th century St Botolph's Priory but have started gathering again just a few hundred yards away. One drinker who has been targeted by police in the town said: "I suppose we can be quite intimidating if we're standing having a drink but we're not bad people. "Although we drink, we do have respect for people. "The police come down, take us off, take our cans away, pour it in the bin and we get moved on but we'll come back down about three hours later."

Is it just me or did everyone else just assume the homeless were allowed to drink where ever they wanted anyway?  I can't remember ever seeing a drunk bum being hassled by the police.  Dude is homeless. I thought the only benefit to being homeless was you were allowed to get bombed wherever, whenever (well that and the freedom of public urination).

I would love to see the idea of bars for homeless though.  Just a cardboard box building, few stools made out of milk crates, kind of a social experiment to see if they behave like we do.  See if the older more hardened bums are jealous of the more recently homeless and their relatively clean shaven look, attracting all the female vagrants.  Would there be beer snobs amongst the homeless?  Is the guy drinking Bud Light going to look down on the guy with only enough change for Keystone?  Stuff like that.

And what's all this business about this being popular in the states?  They're certainly not talking about Boston, unless our policy makers don't consider the Garden or Fenway, Fanueil Hall and the subway as popular with visitors and tourists.  Guys are everywhere.  And I'm not really complaining, again, they're homeless.  I think the least we can do is just ignore them and pretend they're not there while they're rambling on in their drunken stupor (unless of course you're the assholes that piss in the parking garage stairwells and elevators, that shit is just gross). 

PS: Yes this is an overly insensitive post.  I'm not really that cold, I always feel terrible when I ignore their requests for change on the street, a couple of drinks later I'm usually over it though.

Demolition Crew Blows Up The Wrong House

PITTSBURGH (CBS) - A man is at a loss for what to do now that a city contractor mistakenly demolished the home he was fixing up to move into. Andre Hall's property was destroyed by a demolition crew that was slated to demolish not his house, but a home next door. "It's just a crushed dream," Hall said. "I always wanted a piece of Pittsburgh. I finally got it. Now it's gone." Hall said he had construction tools inside of the house and confronted the crew about it. He claimed they stole his construction lumber. "And they said, 'Oh we didn't see any tools,' yet and still you got all my lumber on the back of your truck. Come on, that's crazy," he said. After the controversy the city of Pittsburgh stopped issuing contracts with the business. Pittsburgh Public Safety Director Michael Huss said the city was still reviewing the matter. City council member Theresa Kail-Smith, representative of that district, said the housing program that Hall participated in had merit, but she was concerned about the mix up. "It's not the city's responsibility," Smith said. "It's not their fault. They've taken every step that they should have to make sure that home was not demo'd so I don't think the city bears responsibility but I think we need to talk to the contractor."

My bad? I started out by trying to think of how the contractors would explain this mix up, it seems like one of those things that you just can't apologize for, just hang your head in shame and take whatevers coming to you, but apparently this guy is more upset that the incompetent crew stole his Dewalt Tools (a fine, fine brand) and his 2x4's than he is about the crumpled house on his front lawn.  Dude, your frigen house looks like a pile of splinters right now, how about staying on topic and showing a bit more outrage?

And for the uppity City Council member claiming its not her problem, bull shit.  You're everything that is wrong with politics today.  I'm so tired of city and state officials everywhere claiming no fault whenever something goes wrong with an agent or contractor they hired.  I'll guarantee if anyone digs into this they'll find out the contractors are cousins/nephews/boyhood friends with someone in the mayors office or on city council.  Guy couldn't even read a frigen address number correctly yet he's receiving government contracts for construction.  Yes that is the cities fault.  You're the managers of the city, start taking some responsibility for your work for once.  Any managers in a private sector job who hire an incompetent employee who royally screws up would have to deal with the criticism, and so should you, stop being hypocrites.