B8 dominated a testy affair from start to finish last night, no one's quite sure what the final score was, but if I had to guess it was something along the lines of 15-Nil (not an exaggeration, if anything I'm underselling the final score).
Led by Captain FatAss the opposing team was doomed from the get go, approaching our team to see if we'd agree to play a man down because they only had one sub (meaning fatty didn't feel much like running). B8, like a bunch of sharks in the water smelt the chum and attacked relentlessly from the opening whistle.
Things got a bit testy when the aforementioned Fat Bastard shoved Mazz to the ground, presumably out of frustration (Mazz is the Cortland Finnegan of our league, seemingly always in the middle of these things). Threats of meeting outside (its Co-ed B League soccer, you may have issues) from the opposition were laughed off, and in the second half the domination continued.
Our own team short handed, the goal scoring was spread around quite evenly, with everyone getting in on the action, Ross, Mazz, Kathryn, Dan, Andrea, and Nicole all finding the back of the net. Noticeably missing from the score sheet? CW, not for lack of effort though, I was busy posting a shut out from net, no big deal (not that I didn't take a few full field cracks at the net, just wasn't meant to be last night).
I was going to steal the game ball for myself, but upon further review its going to Nicole. Notching goals, and stonewalling the opposition on defense multiple times, a great all around game.
The post game handshake was a fairly contentious and surreal experience. One member of team fat, stressed saying Happy Holidays to our team, but I couldn't help but feel as though he was saying it in a threatening manner. I didn't know it was possible to make the phrase "Happy Holidays" sound like an invitation to fight, but this douche pulled it off.
The villain of the game (Bobby Moynihan from SNL doppelganger) apologized for his previously insane actions. Upon not receiving an apology in return from Mazz (for falling down when shoved I guess?) he proceed to mutter and rant under his breath and point fingers calling us "major dick heads." Good one. You may want to consider finding another outlet for your insanity other than Co-ed B-League Soccer, I hear taking headers off bridges is good for people in your condition.
