(NewsCore) - A Florida man was facing attempted murder charges Saturday after allegedly stabbing his son over a can of missing lima beans, local broadcaster Bay News 9 reported. Police said they responded to a home in St. Petersburg, Fla., at around 10:00am Friday on a report of a stabbing. When officers arrived on the scene they found 26-year-old Donald Gilley suffering from several stab wounds to the chest and abdomen. His father, 54-year-old Donald Wynn, told police he had stabbed his son with a pocket knife because he believed Gilley had stolen a can of lima beans and other belongings from him.
Look, stabbing him might not have been the right approach here, but the guys son brought it on himself. As a fellow lover of Lima Beans (and frankly, I thought I was the only one until reading this report), I know that there's really only one reason for someone to proclaim their love for the lima bean, and it aint taste. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't like the taste, its just nothing to write home about, not exactly a flavor explosion going on there.
No, you like lima beans because other people don't. It's a loophole in the food sharing chain. Like when I was in college, I'd buy cans of lima beans solely because I knew no one else in the house would touch them. Like if all else fails and we're starving one night, I've got a can of lima beans to fall back on, and they're all mine. You love lima beans for selfish reasons.
So from that standpoint I completely understand this guys anger. He doesn't give a shit if imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, tell that kid to get his own weirdo food that only he loves, lima beans are his dad's thing and that's that.
