I mean, it's inexplicable to me that the US could literally go winless in the opening round of this event. I can't be the only one whose sole focus in gym class on Badminton days was trying to get a shutout, am I? Or the only one who had all out battle royals on the front lawn with cousins and family members during summer cookouts? Was anyone else doing that? Or is my family descended from some kind of secret Badminton Royalty?
At any rate, I could at least do better than this fail:
