Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Girl with Life Threatening Flesh Eating Bacteria Is Exactly Why I don't Swim in Lakes/Rivers

Think of that next time you go water tubing in the allegedly clean lake
  

(CNN) -- A 24-year-old woman in a hospital bed fighting off flesh-eating bacteria has to be told repeatedly -- each time she wakes up -- what has happened, her parents told CNN on Monday. The medication Aimee Copeland is given leads her to forget each time she falls asleep. "It's scary to her," said her mother, Donna Copeland. She asks where she is and "doesn't understand." Yet Aimee Copeland -- who has lost a leg and part of her abdomen to the virulent bacteria and may lose more, including her fingers -- is keeping her spirits strong, her father said. The master's student in psychology at the University of West Georgia was out with friends on May 1 near the Little Tallapoosa River, about 50 miles west of Atlanta, when she grabbed onto a homemade zip line. It snapped. The accident left her with a gash in her left calf that took 22 staples to close. Three days later, when the pain continued, a friend took her to an emergency room, where she was diagnosed with necrotizing fasciitis and flown to Augusta for surgery. She had contracted the flesh-devouring Aeromonas hydrophila. The bacterium is "remarkably common in the water and in the environment," according to Dr. Buddy Creech, an assistant professor of pediatric infectious diseases at Vanderbilt University.

That is flat out terrifying, to Aimee and her family I sincerely hope for the best in your recovery. 

This is what people don't get about my staunch refusal to go swimming in really anything but pools or the ocean. Lakes, Rivers, god forbid ponds, they're disgusting. You go right ahead and wade on into those cesspools. I'll play it safe here on the shore. Everyone thinks I'm being completely irrational but we'll see who's irrational when you scrape your foot on a rock or something and end up having to get your leg amputated. That's horrifying to me. 

Justifies my stance all the more. Like I thought getting a leach on me at the lake as a kid was bad enough, this poor girl is going through hell because of some bacteria laced water. No thanks. You kids have all the fun you want on your tire swings and banana boat rides, I'll be the guy with two legs firing up some hotdogs on the grill for those of you who make it back to shore alive.

Celtics Lose Game 2, Blame the Play Calling

Video of the Dunk...The Most Degrading Highlight of All Time
That's right, blame the play calling.  Doc's handling of the team has beennnn...suspect, to say the least as of late, and last night was really no different. 

Now, let me say this by prefacing that I understand the C's aren't the deepest team in the league, we're playing Ryan Hollins and Greg Stiemsma regular minutes, so it's understood that our bench is in shambles...that said, Doc has used it HORRIBLY these past three games. 

Make no mistake, the Celts had been lucky, very lucky, to win the previous two games. Doc is experimenting with lineups for 4, 5, 6 minutes at a time, that I only saw play together in garbage time. Take for instance Keyon Dooling...This team has an all-world point guard in Rondo, and a very suitable backup in Avery Bradley, yet inexplicably Keyon "Wouldn't Know an Assist if it Hit him in the Face" Dooling is running the for 5 or so minutes a night, mostly in the 4th quarter. It's inexcusable...and that'd be bad enough if that was the only egregious substituion, but it's not.   You know who Keyon's running mates are? Ryan Hollins, Mickael Pietrus, Marquis Daniels, and one of Pierce or Ray Allen...or as I like to call it, 4 guys that are lucky not to be in the D-League, plus an all-star. 

Now, that's a problem that Doc directly affects and should take all the blame for, but wasn't the real problem last night...the real problem last night was game plan and execution. Bottom line is there are players that are performing right now, and there are players that aren't, and that needs to be recognized by the team, and it needs to be the head coach to lays it all out for them. 

Paul Pierce has negative lift on his shots right now. They're not flat, they're hardly reaching the front rim. I love that he's out there trying, and frankly he's still better than Sasha Pavlovic and Mickael Pietrus, but still, he can't be the focal point in the early, middle, or late stages of the game.  Brandon Bass is a black hole in the truest sense of the word. The ball goes to him, and it immediately goes back to the other team. He doesn't pass, he doesn't hit shots, and his defense has been non-existant. Frankly, it might be time to bench him. He's shooting a horrendous 40% for the playoffs, which would be bad enough on it's own, till you consider that last night, he took 15 shots. KG, who's been the teams best scorer, took 12...and only had 4 coming into the 4th quarter. That's a crime against good basketball.

If I'm Doc right now, I'm pulling Rondo into a Rondo only meeting today and showing him highlights of Pierce and Bass tossing up brick after brick with subliminal messages flashing "Give KG the Rock." It needs to be drilled into the team right now that KG needs 5-6 shots per quarter for this team to win. Ray has more or less been Ray, Rondo has been his usual brilliant self, but with the lack of any production from Pierce and Bass, the only reason they've won at all in the last week has been KG's ridiculous playoff performance thus far, that needs to continue. We saw it again in the 4th quarter, he can dominate the game when he's the focal point, and that's exactly what this team needs going forward. 

That's on you Doc. Make the team see it, make Rondo see it, make someone take Brandon Bass hostage before Wednesdays game, and most of all, make Pierce accept it.

Wild Hogs 3: Former Cruise Worker Calls out Travolta for Open Robe Boner Hug



TMZ - The steward, Fabian Zanzi, claims he was delivering something to Travolta's stateroom when the actor asked him for a neck massage. Although the report doesn't expressly name Travolta, we've confirmed the actor was indeed the guest in question. Fabian claimed he obliged -- and Travolta "then told him he was a beautiful person and invited him to return to visit him later that night." Fabian claimed he refused because of a strict company policy banning RC employees from fraternizing with guests. Fabian reported the incident and was disciplined for the neck massage, which is a violation of the no-fraternization rule. He subsequently left the company. Fabian now says the encounter was much more than described in the incident report, claiming Travolta opened his robe and gave him a big hug while his penis was erect ... and offered him $12,000 for sex and silence. 

Follow the link above for the video, for some reason it's un-embeddable right now. 

Travolta you magnificent bastard! What a play here! What material! What a perv!

This man's quest for happy endings during massages bows to no mans...yea it's odd that  you're offering to throw out the reverse happy ending once in a while, and guys aren't my thing, but no judgement there, but you have to admire the effort. The open robe-boner hug is as blunt as it gets, just laying it all on the line. This guy is just absolutely relentless in his pursuit of happiness. Making Thomas Jefferson, John Adams, and Will Smith in that one movie as proud as can be. 

Serious question though, doesn't ratting out customers violate some kind of masseur code? There's a rubber/rubbee confidentiality agreement, isn't here? If not there should be. Even with non-skeevy customers these people have access to every weird hair growth, mole, eczema patch...I feel like as much as your average personal doctor these folks should have to keep their mouths shut. Can't be good for business to go rolling around town talking about you client's boners.

Happy Bryce Harper Day: Bryce Harper's First Home Run and Curtain Call

Personally, I hope he curtain calls the next 500 or so too.

If the folks over at Sports Illustrated don't have a black leather bound, gold trim, commemorative edition photo book celebrating Bryce's seasons of first out at the end of the season, they're just flat out leaving money on the table, I'll have to find something else to spend the $54.95 for a two year subscription to SI on (That's Over 50% Off the Cover Price!).

In all seriousness though, between Strasburg and Harper you could easily argue there's no better franchise to be a fan of right now...unless of course championships in the extremely short term are important to you, I guess then you could make an argument.

PS: I'll all but gaurantee that when these baby name lists come out next year, Bryce is the number one name in the greater D.C. area.