Indoor Soccer Wrap-up Week 3: VICTORY

Pretty much what the opposition must have felt like last night. Yep, just all out domination from B8. Aggressive defense, sure handed goal keeping and timely offensive attacks. Never before has the pitch seen such a complete team game. 


This one included some chippiness from both sides.  B8 displayed an aggressiveness not yet seen, and the opposition was none too pleased about it.  Playing up the stereotypical panzy soccer player roles to perfection, the opposition cried foul and wet themselves at the slightest physical contact, led by their whining goal keeper and Bieber like striker.


Highlights included a breathtaking aerial strike off the curly haired head of captain Ross (assist Pascal), a text book give and go break by yours truly and the one and only Mazz.  Ross once again putting a shot on his own net, miraculously saved by The Huz (probably the toughest shot he had to save all night), and finally an open net goal by Andrea as the malcontent goalie from the other team was caught out of his net for the 100th time of the night. 


Mazz suggested this weeks game  ball go to The Team , we here at the Alt-Tab think ceremonial game balls are for 5 year olds playing Tee ball, and adult losers.  Andrea was going to receive game ball due to the look of utter disdain her open net goal put on the face of the goalie, but unfortunately will have to accept honorable mention because of breaking news (literally, you'll understand in a second) brought to my attention.  The game ball goes to Amanda, who un-announced until last night, suffered a broken nose in our first game yet has not missed a game.  A true warrior who embodies the B8 (seriously I hate this name someone please make a suggestion) team spirit. Congrats Amanda.

How Awesome is the Merchant of Death

BANGKOK -- Accused Russian arms merchant Viktor Bout was flown from Bangkok toward New York Tuesday in a chartered U.S. plane, extradited in manacles despite a final outraged push by Russian diplomats to persuade Thailand to release him instead, current and former American officials said.  A former Soviet military officer and air cargo executive nicknamed the "Merchant of Death" by critics, Bout had been accused of arming failed states and insurgents across the Third World since the 1990s, but he had never previously been arrested. Thailand's government ordered Bout, 43, placed in American custody Tuesday, 20 months after his March 2008 arrest in a sting operation led by U.S. narcotics agents. Since then, the wealthy businessman -- estimated by the U.S. to be worth $6 billion -- has been in a Thai jail...Bout has been accused of supplying weapons that fueled civil wars in South America, the Middle East and Africa, with clients ranging from Liberia's Charles Taylor and Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi to the Taliban government that once ran Afghanistan. He was an inspiration for an arms dealer character played by Nicolas Cage in the 2005 film "Lord of War."

Say what you want about his ethics or business model but this man has two great things going for him.  One, the Merchant of Death nickname.  Probably the best nickname in history since Vlad the Impaler.  People probably just running for cover any time he visits their village and showering him with whatever gifts their impoverished lifestyles can provide at his demand.  Daughters and wives wanting to be with him, husbands and fathers wishing they could be him. Probably the most bad ass dude on the planet.  

Secondly, a hall of fame worthy mustache.  Just says "cross me, and bombs will rain down on your village for a week."  Nothing more, nothing less. A good mustache should fit a mans demeanor and personality, and this one nails it.  Actually that's probably why Hitler's 'stache is looked upon so poorly. Has to the the least fitting facial hair in history.  Evil genius, attempting to kill off an entire religion while taking over a continent, paired with a previously love-able comic mustache made popular by Charlie Chaplin.  Odd choice, probably one of the factors in his ultimate failure.

By the way if he is convicted is his nickname up for grabs?  Will warlords everywhere be competing for this title or is he allowed to take it to the can with him?  I hope he doesn't have to give it up.  I'm not sure the world can handle a bunch of lunatic arms dealers showing off and creating chaos all to earn the vacated title (though I'd totally throw my hat in the ring).  

Recently Watched A Tyler Perry Movie

So I'd never bothered to watch any of this Tyler Perry junk prior to this past week (the picture above had a lot to do with it.  All the shows just look loud and corny).  In fact I've never known anyone that has watched any of his movies or tv shows, so I think I may be the first.  Anyway, I didn't intend to watch the movie, it was one of those dvr crap-shoot situations where you exit a show/movie you had recorded and you're at the mercy of whatever is showing on the channel you were previously watching.  9 times out of 10 you crap out.  But this was that 10th time, and    it    was     Awesome.  

The movie wasn't one of the corny Meet the Brown sequels, it was one of the darker dramas (no pun intended, seriously), Diary of Angry Black People or Why Did I Marry My Baby Momma II or some shit.  Well let me tell you, Tyler Perry brings it hard in those movies.  I happened to tune in right in the middle of some kind of Holiday dinner scene with a bunch of couples and they just let loose and dropped bombs on each other for the entire scene like;  "Why don't you tell your wife about your mistress", "Well why don't you tell him who the daddy really is", "Why doesn't he tell you that he got tested for VD", "How about you blaming your wife for the death of your son."

Seriously, none of those are made up or exagerrations.  Just film history being made left and right at that dinner table.  I was riveted for the next 15-20 minutes.  Sat right in front of the tv like a little kid, right up until all the drama wore down and the couples started making up.  The movie lost me there, felt too unrealistic, no one is making up with their spouse after having an A-Bomb dropped right in the middle of their turkey dinner.  I also noticed that all the characters continued to wear Cosby sweaters after the holiday dinner, and they all drove around in black Ranger Rovers, Escalades, and Denali's, just didn't ring true.  

Bottom line is I still wouldn't recommend these movies to anyone, they're still really corny,  and I feel a bit embarrassed for even admitting I watched 20 minutes of one.  But I will say next time you happen to land on one of these movies give it 10-15 minutes.  You won't be let down.